Someone's House Jokes - 8 Hilarious Someone's House Jokes

I hate when you're over someone's house and they start asking you stupid questions.

Like "who are you" and "is that a gun?"

When I go to someone's house and they tell me to make myself at home,

the first thing I do is throw them out because I don't like visitors.

A robber went into someone's house and stole all the lamps

To his surprise, he later found the owner of said house de-lighted

While you're at someone's house, it's pretty easy to tell if they like plants.

Just look around and see if they botany.

If I stay at someone's house and they don't have any bread available come breakfast time I will refuse to stay any longer

I'm lack toast intolerant

What would you call an addendum to burglary laws that would state that it's legal to break and enter into someone's house, provided you leave them with a gift?

The Santa clause

Thief breaks into a house

A thief broke into someone's house at night. Out of nowhere he hears "Jesus is watching you". He turns to the left, nothing, then to the right, still nothing. He hears it again "Jesus is watching you". He looks up and sees a parrot.
Thief: "What's your name?"
Parrot: "Moses"
Thief: "What id...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Three Men are at the Gates of Heaven

And St. Peter asks them to tell their story of how they died before being let in.

The first man speaks and says "I came home one day to find my wife naked in bed. I previously suspected that she was having an affair, but this confirmed it. I looked everywhere for the guy, and I finally found ...

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