When he gets there the devil begins to explain his everlasting torment. "Down here you will wade in scalding magma, always burning and unable to die. There will be noxious fumes that pour into your lungs, you will always be suffocating but always conscious. You will be whipped and flayed and never r...
What do you get when you pour scalding water in a rabbit hole?
A hot, cross, bunny.
Jack, a renown atheist, dies...
... and to his utter surprise ends up in hell where he's greeted by Satan himself.
Completely shocked he talks to the devil and says: "Welp, I've been wrong all my life and I guess I'm now to pay the price for my lack of faith"
Satan laughs and replies: "Awh it's not so bad down here, ...
A man goes to a diner and orders a grilled cheese and a room temperature ice tea.
The waiter returns a few minutes later with his food. The man takes a sip of his tea but finds it is scalding hot. He turns to his waiter and yells "I thought this was room temperature!" The waiter says "It is sir, the kitchen is on fire."
Me: “I’m a shower not a grower.”
Her: “Why don’t you come round and prove it?”
Don’t know why she got upset with me when I turned up with shampoo and conditioner and sprayed her with scalding hot water as soon as she turned me on.
A man walked into the ER with severe burns and blisters to both sides of his face.
He was quickly admitted. The attending physician asked him, “how on earth did you burn your face so badly?”
The man reluctantly began his explanation. “It’s actually kind of embarrassing doc. See my wife is out of town this week, and so I’m having to do my own cooking...”
“Ah, I see...
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
Pissed Off
A small, balding man storms into a local bar and demands, "Gimme a double of the strongest whiskey you got. I'm so mad, I can't even see straight."
The bartender, noticing that the little man is a bit worse for the wear, pours him a double of Southern Comfort. The man swills down the drink an...
The Rabbi and the Devil
So, one day, the devil visits a synagogue while all the folk are deep in the middle of whatever it is they do at synagogues.
Once the smoke and clamour clears, the devil steps forth, slicing the air his pitchfork, flashing eyes of fire. At the sight of him, hooves and all, all the men and wo...
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