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What's worse than a receding hairline?

An advancing hairline

My pet rock has a receding hairline

He’s a little boulder

My friend keeps thinking that he has a receding hairline

I told him it's all in his head

The devil has started to get really self conscious about his receding hairline and is planning to take out his anger on the humans if he cant find a solution.....

There's going to be hell toupee

One of my oldest friends is my receding hairline...

We go way back.

What do you call 20 rabbits walking backwards?

A receding hairline.

I love these definitions!

\-- Coffee (n.), the person upon whom one coughs.



\-- Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how much weight you have gained.



\-- Abdicate (v.), to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.



\-- Esplanade (v.), to attempt an explanation while drunk. ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A list of puns

Here's a list of puns I've been collecting:

How do you throw a space party? You planet.

How was Rome split in two? With a pair of Ceasars.

Nope. Unintended.

The shovel was a ground breaking invention, but everyone was blow away by the leaf blower.

A scarecrow says,...

Heavy Petting Zoo

Wife comes home to hearing disturbing squealing noises from the upstairs bedroom. She hesitates for a minute as her mind jumps to the very worst horrific possibility of her already shattered excuse of a marriage; then proceeds to venture up the stairs closer and closer to the sloppy wet splashing an...

Did you hear about the bald guy who cracked his skull?

Doctor said he had a receding hairline fracture.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Hannibal Lecter escapes his prison, and begins a cannibalistic killing spree.

Bodies turn up all over the city, mutilated and butchered like livestock. The livers are missing from the bodies, as is muscle from the shoulders, legs and back, the tongues, a variety of human flesh all carved out and eaten by Lecter after killing his victims.

Not only that, but he escapes t...

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