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Protestants Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What’s the difference between Jews, Protestants, and Baptists?

Jews do not recognize Jesus as the Messiah.

Protestants do not recognize the Pope as the head of the Church.

Baptists do not recognize each other in the liquor store.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My best Catholic joke (as told by my priest)

A town decided to form a clergy group to have Catholics, Jews, Protestants and Muslims gather to talk about various issues facing their places of worship. The Rabbi went first and said they were having a terrible issue with squirrels. He said they were hanging around outside of church and aggressive...

There are three truths in religion:

1) Jewish people do not recognize Jesus as the Messiah.


2) Protestants do not recognize the Pope as the leader of the Christian faith.


3) Baptists don't recognize each other in the liquor store.

How do you unite both the Catholics and Protestants in Ireland?

By sending in millions of Muslims

A 10 year old protestant boy and a 10 year old catholic girl are standing on a river bank.

A 10 year old protestant boy and a 10 year old catholic girl are standing on a river bank.

The girl says, "my mom will be really angry if my shoes get wet"
And so they both agree to remove their shoes prior to entering the water.

They wade into the water and it starts getting deeper...

Quentin Crisp Quote

“When I told the people of Northern Ireland that I was an atheist, a woman in the audience stood up and said, 'Yes, but is it the God of the Catholics or the God of the Protestants in whom you don't believe?”

Pope in Hotel

The Pope is on a "business trip".

In the hotel,he asked his secretary if the hotel had a sauna, and the secretary confirmed.

The pope says: "ok, let's go to the sauna."

The secretary is shocked, "Your Holiness, it's a mixed sauna!"

Pope: "Since when are you afraid of Prot...

A little Catholic boy and a little Protestant girl, both about four years old, were growing up in Northern Ireland...

Even though Catholics and Protestants didn’t generally get along with one another, the two played together often, not understanding why their families said they shouldn’t be friends.

On one particularly hot day, the two were playing when the little girl said, “‘Tis terribly hot today. We sho...

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