This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

To poot it nicely

I have to take a shit

When my girlfriend sits on the photocopier and farts...

she's Imagin Poots

A lady with a mildly upset tummy gets on a street car for a cross town appointment...

When approaching the first stop, she notices the street car’s brakes make a horribly loud racket. Given the state of her upset tummy she decides that she can take advantage of the street car’s worn brakes. Cautiously, upon approaching the next stop she perfectly times the release of a small amount...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

So a newlywed couple is in bed after their wedding day when...

The husband lets out a massive fart and the wife says " What was that?"
The husband responds "A game. Im winning 7-0" later the wife lets out a fart and says "7-7!"
The wife follows up with another poot and claims the score 14-7. Finally the the husband fart so explosively that he shits the be...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A woman is going with her boyfriend to his parents' house...

...to meet and have dinner with them. This is a very important night, and she wants to make a good impression – she even made some bean pies for the occasion, the parents' favorite.

They get to the house, and are having dinner – so far everything is going just fine. Then…disaster strikes. Sh...

What do you call a fart that doesn't matter?

A moot poot.

How do robots go to the bathroom?

They come poot.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A Boy Meets His Girlfriend's Dad for the First Time...

A boy, named Jimmy, is meeting his girlfriend's family for the first time. He especially wants to impress the father.

He ends up sitting on the porch with the father and the family dog, Rover, with the pooch sitting under his chair. The conversation carries on for a little bit until it dies d...

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