Two men, Jim and John, are walking their dogs when they pass by a restaurant.

“Let’s go in and get something to eat,” Jim suggests.

“We can’t,” responds John. “Don’t you see the sign says No Pets Allowed?”

“Oh, that sign?” says Jim. “Don’t worry about it.”

Taking out a pair of sunglasses, he walks up to the door. As he tries walking into the restaurant, t...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two buddies were out for a saturday stroll

One had a doberman and the other had a chihuahua. As they sauntered down the street, the guy with doberman said to his friend, "Let's go over to that bar and get something to drink."

The guy with the chihuahua said, "We can't go in there. We've got dogs with us."

The one with the Dober...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

How Many Dogs Does It Take to Change a Light Bulb?

**Golden Retriever**: The sun is shining, the day is young, we've got our whole lives ahead of us, and you're inside worrying about a stupid burned-out light bulb?

**Border Collie**: Just one. And I'll replace any wiring that's not up to code.

**Dachshund**: I can't reach the stupid la...

A Burglar Breaks into a house...

He breaks into the house and initially he hears "Jesus is watching you." He shrugs it off and continues to his burglary. Again he hears, "Jesus is watching you." He looks around and sees a parrot, and the bird repeats, "Jesus is watching you." The burglar asks the bird what its name is, and it says ...

Gorilla Problem

A woman woke up one morning to find a ferocious-looking gorilla in a tree on her African plantation. She quickly phoned the local game warden, who arrived minutes later. In one hand he held a shotgun, and in the other the leash of a fierce Doberman pinscher. As they walked to the tree, the warden ex...

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