Communism sounds good on paper...

..unless you’re reading a history book.

Boating sounds like a terrible idea on paper

But it's a thousand times better on water.

You know, just based on my “relationship resume,” on paper, I’m a great catch!

In practice, however, I’m more catch and release.

Communism is a System That Looks Pretty Great on Paper.

Unless of course, that paper makes up the pages of a History book.

Write this joke down on paper

Then it won't just be bad, it'll be tearable.

Why do we still call them newspapers when most of them aren't on paper...

and most of them don't contain news?

Did you hear that they're broadcasting the World Origami Championships?

It's on paper-view.

Three guys go into an interview at the local telephone company

Three guys go into an interview for a job at the local telephone company. They were all three great candidates and very well qualified. The boss brings them into the office and says "Okay, you three look the best on paper but I gotta know if you have what it takes for the day to day work. So, I'm go...

Anybody know who won the origami fight last night?

I couldn't find it anywhere on Paper-View

Did you hear about the guy who was run over in a freak steamroller incident in a printing shop?

He made quite a splash across the headlines, but left a good impression on paper

Badoom pssshhh

You know what they say about the French royal family?

It was a good idea on paper but they lost their heads in the execution.

Attention

I'm such an introvert that if I ever have to draw attention I draw it on paper

I got an honours degree in calligraphy.

To be honest I don't think it's going to help me get a job,
But it looks good on paper...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A traffic cop stops a man for speeding

Policeman: "Can I see your driver's license?".

Man: "I don't have it, they suspended it for speeding."

Policeman: "Can you show me the registration document of the car?".

Man: "It's not mine, I stole it".

Policeman: "You stole this car?".

Man: “Exactly. But wait a...

My girlfriend out-dad joked me today

Scene: I’m making coffee and using scissors to open a new bag of coffee:

Me: These scissors are blunt, we need new ones.

Her: Well they work fine on paper.

Me: *facepalm*



The student surpasses the master. I’m not even mad.

Two guys are stuck in prison.

Desperate to get back out and perhaps lead semi-regular lives, the two cellmates try to brainstorm for an escape plan. A mere hour and a half later, one of the men comes up with a plan: steal some children's craft scissors, smuggle them back to the cell, cut through the floor, and cut out a tunnel b...

I just drew a sketch of myself wearing a rolex in front of a giant mansion with a bunch of lambos all around me

So on paper I'm a millionaire.

I just finished writing a book on cats

It would have been a lot easier if I had written it on paper though

Why are written puns worse than puns spoken aloud?

Puns on paper are tearable.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A very unlucky man with one testicle

There was this very unlucky man who only had one testicle. One day while he was travelling on a plane, the captain makes an announcement and tells that one of the engines of the plane have failed and one person must be thrown off the plane. To pick this person, they write everyone's seat numbers on ...

I watched this awesome show called Origami Wrestling yesterday

It was on paper-view

What do you all think about guillotines? [DAD JOKE INCOMING]

They’re good on paper, but I don’t really like the execution.

Is it better to write on a full stomach or an empty one?

It is better to write on paper

For anyone interested in watching the World Origami Championships

It’s on paper view.

Why are the books always better than the movies?

Because, like communism, some things just worked out better on paper

Why are pencils and communism so similar?

They both only work on paper!

On an examination paper, The professor required his students to sign a form stating they had received no outside assistance...

....Unsure of whether he should sign the form, a student stated that he had prayed for the assistance of God.

The professor carefully studied the answer script....

...and then said: "You can sign with a clear conscience. God did not assist you."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A physics professor asks this question in his class.

If a plane is flying in South East direction at 795 miles an hour and it takes a torque of 58000 N/m2 to unscrew a nut from the main pillar of Brooklyn Bridge, then calculate my age as of today?

The ivy league geniuses in the class immediately went to work. Firing up thier computers and calc...

I wanted to put "calligraphy" as a skill on my resume.

I decided against it since it probably looks better on paper.

The Cleveland Browns are covering the playing field in cardboard for Sunday's game.

Because they always play better on paper.

Earth is flat

...on paper

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Man: Doctor i think i have a problem, everywhere i look i see naked women

Doctor: interesting. Alright let's see. *doctor draws a circle on paper.* What do you see here?

Man: A naked woman

Doctor: Hmm. *draws a rectangle on paper.* And what do you see here?

Man: A naked woman again

Doctor: Alright. *draws a triangle on paper*. And here?

...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.