My wife handed me two kayak paddles and asked, "Which one do you want?"
I said I'd take either/oar.
Imagine if oars could swim?
Wouldn't that be oar-swam?
I'm so sorry...
A man was out on a fishing trip
When suddenly, he dropped one of his oars into the water, frustrated that he couldn't get the boat moving, he decided to seek help.
He saw someone with two beautiful women on his boat who also had a spare oar. "Excuse me, may I borrow one of your oars?" he yelled. The man appeared offended...
What do you call a potato with one oar?
A fisherman is sitting on a river bank. Suddenly, he hears somebody shout ‘F*ck off!’ in the distance.
Ten minutes later he hears the same shout ‘F*ck off!!!!!’, but a bit closer. The fisherman shrugs his shoulders having no idea of what’s going on. Another ten minutes later when he has already forgotten about the strange shout, he sees a boat with a man rowing up the river… with spoons. So the f...
One day a man decided to retire...
He booked himself on a Caribbean cruise and proceeded to have the time of his life, that is, until the ship sank.
He soon finds himself on an island with no other people, no supplies, nothing, only bananas and coconuts.
After about four months, he is lying on the beach one ...
Did you hear the boating store was having a big sale?!!??
It was quite the oar deal.
A British couple are on a cruise ship. It sinks, and they're the only survivors left, managing to get on a boat
They can spot land not far off. They try as hard as they can to use the oars, but they won't budge.
The wife has an idea, she calls her husband useless and incompetent. The husband retorts and a huge argument begins.
The boat inches slowly towards land. The more they argue and ...
transatlantic voyage 5 dollars
A guy sees a newspaper ad that says "transatlantic voyage only five dollars". He's never been overseas so he heads down to the dock on the coast and sure enough, there's a shack with a sign "transatlantic voyage $5". He gives the attendant five bucks and is handed a pair of oars. The attendant sh...
Dad's favorite ship joke.
A ship's quartermaster descends into the galley to address the rowers. "I have good news," he said. "Today, all of your food and alcohol rations have been doubled." As he said this, a cheer went up from the slaves and they eagerly grabbed at their oars.
"One more thing," he added. "The captai...
Two blondes were driving out in the country side
One looked out the window and saw another blonde in the middle of a field sitting in a rowboat, working the oars.
She pointed her out and said, "Its idiots like that that give us all a bad name."
"You're right," said her companion, "let's go drown her."
I went boating with cast of friends the other day...
None of them could use an oar, but Lisa Kudrow.
This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔
Out to Sea
So there were these two Irish guys who decided they should go to the bar. The bar was right across the river but the nearest bridge was a few miles down the road. They agreed that they could just take a rowboat across and save time.
About the time they are crossing the river, a storm come...
A U. S. Navy destroyer stops four Mexicans in a row boat rowing towards California...
The captain gets on the loud-hailer and shouts, "Ahoy, small craft. Where are you headed?"
One of the Mexicans puts down his oar, stands up, and replies, "We are invading the United States of America to reclaim the territory taken by the USA during the 1800s."
The entire crew of the ...
The indecisive rower...
...couldn't choose either oar.
A blonde was driving along in the countryside
just enjoying the views and the rolling hills, when suddenly she happened upon another blonde sitting in a boat in the middle of the field, pulling the oars like her life depended.
Our hero slammed the brakes and exited her car, storming towards the boat and the still-rowing fair-haired woman...
A guide and a tourist are sailing past the coast...
They sail past a few sights and the guide gives some backstory on these.
Eventually they sail past a man and a woman making a ruckus in the bushes. The guide is embarrassed and says: "These people are just cycling."
The tourist grabs an oar and throws it at the guy's head.