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Molested Jokes

As a child i was molested by mimes

They did unspeakable things to me.

Ive just been molested by a group of mime artists...

They did unspeakable things to me.

There's a new drug that is guarenteed to get you molested.

The only side effect is you feel Spacey.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call a robot that’s been sexually molested?

R2ME2

I molested an intensive care patient...

but his nurse walked in at the last moment.

It was real touch-and-go for a while there.

Droids claim they were molested by George Lucas during filming for Star Wars...

#R2MeToo

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why was the jeweler's son sexually molested?

He went to Jared's.

I think I'm about to be molested by an alpaca...

Today some guy on the street kept screaming at me to "be ready for the alpaca lips"

What do you call a bird that has been molested?

Rustled Crow

Barry Gibb has revealed that he was nearly molested as a child…

…but the would-be abuser gave him the HeebieBeeGees…

After a young boy was molested by a priest, the police asked him what happened.

The young boy responded, "I knew I was in trouble when the the priest told me to call him Daddy instead of Father"

My uncle works at a camp for kids who are about to be molested

I mean everyone complains about their job but he loved everyday of his

At my therapy session today, I suddenly remembered that as a child I was molested by a clown.

I never knew I had IT in me.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

When I told my date I was raised Catholic, she asked me right away whether I was molested as a child.

I’m still butt hurt about it.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I told my friend, "My dad just passed away. I think it's only right for me to now say...that he molested me when I was three-years-old."

"Woah, man," he said. "Too soon."


I said, "Well, yes. But that's not how a paedophile's mind works."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why did the boy laugh when he was molested by a test?

Because the testicles

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