What do you call an Aztec Mayan snake god tied in a knot?

Pretzalcoatl

The Mayans were right.

They were just off by 8 years.

The mayans made a typo.

They meant 2021 and not 2012.

According to Mayan legend, the earth would come to an end in the year 2012.

2021\*

What the Mayans taught me

The Mayans taught me that if you don't finish something, it's not really the end of the world.

Everyone's making Mayan jokes

Like there's no tomorrow!

Two women archaeologists are down in Mexico excavating an ancient Mayan burial ground looking for some remains to take back to their museum.

Unfortunately, everything they run across is badly decomposed. One of the two says, "We don't seem to be having much luck."
The other replies, "Keep on digging, honey, a good Mayan is hard to find!"

Dear world...

+8

Sincerely, the Mayans.

That kid didn't really find a lost Mayan city. The sites that promoted the story?

I guess they'll issue a...

Maya culpa.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Roger was very thin because he was afraid to spend a lot of money on food. He looked forward to the day when his grandfather would die and leave him a fortune.

His grandfather was blessed with both a sense of humor and a sense of justice. So he planned that when he finally died all he would leave to Roger was a cookie.

But what a cookie.

It was made with butter, churned from milk from a yak milked by a virginal milkmaid on the highest field o...

Typical Mayans ...

4 years late

Back in 2011...

My friend predicted the world would end in 2012. I said your guess is as good as Mayan.

One day there were three grave robbers searching through a graveyard in Central America

They came across an Ancient Mayan temple which had three doors. the first grave robber walker up to the first door and looked inside, he saw a black pedestal with nothing on it, and in the back of the room there were piles of gold and riches, so he walked in and grabbed a handful of gold, but as he ...

Chichen Itza is not yours!

It's Mayan.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

[nsfw] Voodoo Dick (Long)

Lucia popped into her local South American produce shop on the way home from work (it was enchilada night). While browsing she got a call from her bff Natalie and spent some time talking about the recent divorce, and her lack of sex life. Shortly after hanging up, she was approached by the store cle...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

"Angry Notes" Courtesy of Saurabh on Fropki.com

Dear Noah,
We could have sworn you said the ark wasn't leaving till 5.
Sincerely,
Unicorns

Dear Twilight fans,
Please realize that because vampires are dead and have no blood pumping through them, they can never get it up. Enjoy dreaming about that.
Sincerely,
Logic

D...

Sometimes I drink to cure my malaise.

If I get drunk this Friday because I am bummed about the end of the world, am I getting sauced because of Mayan-aise?

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.