What did the talking pony who had laryngitis and didn't understand humor say to the doctor?

I'm having a hard time speaking clearly.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

There’s been a rash of laryngitis sweeping through the Scandinavian equine circuit

Quick! Call the Hoarse Norse Horse Nurse!

I have laryngitis and my girlfriend cheated on me.

I can't tell you how upset I am.

Last week I went to the doctor’s office. Before I could get a word out, she says, “You have laryngitis.”

I said, “What does that mean?”
She said, “... Never mind.”

What was the pig when he got laryngitis...?

He was dis-gruntled!

What is a vegans worst fear?

Laryngitis.

A guy with a whimpering faint voice orders an ice cream...

Vendor asks: "Crushed nuts?"
Guy whimpers back: "No. Laryngitis."

It pains me to say this

but I have laryngitis.

A speaker arrives in a small town for a conference...

A speaker arrives in a small town for a conference, and checks into his hotel. Having caught laryngitis a few days before, he sets out down Main St. looking for a doctor's office. It's a small town on a Friday afternoon so he is worried he won't find anyone to treat him, and that he won't be able ...

A man worked for a road crew. One day he woke up ill...

...with a touch of laryngitis - but being a dedicated employee he went to work.

The boss felt rather sorry for him and didn't want him to do any physical labor - as they were repairing a part of the freeway. He says, "Why don't you go down the road and tell people to slow down going through t...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

New weights and measures

1. The ratio of an igloo's circumference to its diameter = Eskimo Pi

2. 2000 pounds of Chinese soup = Won ton

3. 1 millionth of a mouthwash = 1 microscope

4. Time between slipping on a peel and smacking the pavement = 1 bananosecond

5. Weight an evangelist carries with Go...

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