If you say "gullible" slowly enough, it actually sounds like"oranges"

Give it a try

Gullible isn't in the dictionary.

Don't believe me, look it up!

Saying Gullible Slowly Enough Makes It Sound Like "Lemon"

It's really weird,

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My wife just accused me of being a gullible cunt...

*I almost dropped my Bible*

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My colleague at work said I'm a gullible twat.

Who am I to argue with the current WWE champion?

What do you get when you mix a gullible and an optimistic person.

Read it again

Did you know...?

Did you know that being gullible is contagious?

To make a better Internet, I compiled a list of scams and manipulation techniques in order to raise awareness in the most gullible users.

Number 27 will make you cringe

Trump was told that the word 'gullible' had been removed from the dictionary.

"Don't be ridiculous," he replied, "there's no such word as dictionary."

What does gullible sound like if you say it very slowly?

Orange

My wife and I had a huge argument last week. She called me gullible and financially irresponsible.

I can't wait to see the look on her face when I tell her I just won the Nigerian lottery!

World's Most Gullible Man

A man is talking to a local at the pub. He goes and introduces himself.

The man then turns to the local and asks, "Have you heard my name before— perhaps in the news?"

The local replies *"No Sir, I have not."*

The man explains how he had "Won the title of the World's Most Gulli...

My kids are so gullible.

After all these years, they still think I'm out buying cigarettes.

Did you know that the word "gullible" cannot even be found in the dictionary?

The truth hurts doesn't it?

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A bum is riding a bus and notices a pretty nun sitting near him.

A bum is riding a bus and notices a pretty nun sitting near him. He tries to hit on her but she doesn't respond positively. Later, the bus driver tells him to go to the graveyard that night and the nun will be there praying, and to pretend to be Jesus and she'll let the bum bone her. The bum goes to...

As kids, we were gullible enough to believe in fictional characters we never see like Santa and the Easter Bunny. As adults, we know better...

Thank God.

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Classic

A woman goes to the doctors complaining about her partner. "I just keep thinking he's only with me because I'm gullible and stupid" she sobbed "Could there be something mentally wrong with me?" "I'm sorry Miss Jones" said the doctor, taking off his glasses. "I'm going to have to take a look at yo...

The worst thing you can be is gullible

My friend told me that means you're prone to random attacks by seagulls

The Rusky and the Kraut

Seems there was a young soldier, who, just before battle, told his sergeant that he didn't have a rifle.

"That's no problem, son," said the sergeant. "Here, take this broom. Just point it at the Germans, and go 'Bangety Bang Bang'."

"But what about a bayonet, Sarge?" asked the young (a...

My mom taught me that it is impossible to hum and wink at the same time...

She also taught me that I was gullible, kind of like the people who are reading this and just tried to hum and wink with ease. Thank mom, I love you!

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My take on a shaggy dog story

A man walks into a bar, orders a pint and sees a sign pinned up above the till - “talking cat, going cheap.”

He calls the barman over and asks him what the deal with the cat is and can he have a look at it. The man shrugs, goes into the back and returns with a mangy old Tom cat.

“Here ...

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A man returns home early from work one afternoon to find his wife spread out on the bed naked, puffing and panting.

“What are you doing?” the man inquires.
“Err,” she stammers back. “I… um… I think I’m having a heart attack!”
“Oh,” cries the gullible husband, “quick, I’ll call an ambulance!”

He runs downstairs, picks up the phone and begins dialing 911, when his son Johnny appears, sobbing his little...

3 men were sentenced to death by firing.

The day of the execution came, and the firing squad leads the men to the execution grounds.

 

Now, this firing squad was rather well-known to be the most gullible group around, and it’s due to this knowledge that the first man started to hatch a cunning plan to escape.

...

Local mom finds cure to weight loss, Scientist are dumbfounded...

at how gullible people on the internet are.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man with a stutter started his new job on a construction site...

Not sure if this is a repost, my father told me it when I was 11 years old.

A man with a stutter (Dave) started his new job on a construction site and was walking around with one of his colleagues (Jim) being given a tour of the site.
“Th-th-this is a pretty cool p-p-place. I’m so h-happ...

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Topical Jokes for 11/2

(for best results, read in the voice of your favorite late night host)

In Alabama, a man who robbed a Subway said he did so because he tried the “Subway Diet”, but didn’t lose weight. Police describe the suspect as armed and extremely gullible.

In New York City, a health department wor...

I aspire to write jokes for laffy taffy.

Q: What do you call a gullible vampire?

A: A sucker

A man is talking with his pet fish,

The fish tells the man that the word "gullible" is on the ceiling, the man looks and sees nothing on the ceiling.

The fish mutters under it's breath, "Heh, gillable."

A genie appears in front of a man, and grants him three wishes.

Man: For my first wish, I would like a TV camera to look at during oppurtune moments.

Genie: Granted. Your second wish?

Man: I wish everyone was super gullible.

Genie: Done. And for your final wish?

Man: I wish for updog.

Genie: What's updog?

Man: Not much, ...

Would you believe scientists have crossed sea birds with male cows?

They call it a "Gullible"

So I was walking down the street one day, when an oddly dressed man caught my attention.

He was wearing a long, white, clinical robe and shouting at nearly everybody that came within his proximity. Having foolishly stopped out of curiosity he approached me. “Global Warming is having a drastic effect on the globes axis!”, he yelped. “The rotation of the Earth is speeding up dramatically,...

Three women- a blond, a brunette, and a red head, are all about to be executed by ISIS

The red head was up first. Right before she was going to be executed she yelled, “TORNADO!” All of the ISIS members took cover and she escaped. The brunette was the next in line. She followed in the red-head’s footprints and this time screamed “SANDSTORM!” The gullible ISIS members again ducked for ...

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