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Hottie Jokes

A 60 years old billionaire marries a hot 25 year old girl...

After honeymoon they throw a party celebrating their marriage...

After a few drinks, billionaire's friends want to know the secret of how he landed 25 yo hottie..

"It's simple" billionaire boasts... "I faked my age"

"Yes, but even for a 40/45 years old guy...she is sensational, ...

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Wonder Woman is a hottie...

One day superman was flying around a city high in the sky. He glances down to see Wonder Woman laying on top of a building. On closer inspection he realized that she is butt naked with her legs spread wide open. Superman thinks to himself "you know, I am faster than a speeding bullet, I bet I could ...

What do you call a bunch of hotties walking down the street?

March of Dimes

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So a guy meets a hottie at the hotel bar. After he pays for a few drinks she starts coming on pretty strong...

"Let's go up to my room..." she says, "I'm wined, dined, and ready to be 69ed!" Excitedly, he whisks her up to the room and the next thing you know they are ripping clothes off and making out furiously. They hit the bed, stuff their faces into each others genitals, and start going to town. After a f...

What do you call an attractive lady terrorist?

A Ji-hottie

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[NSFW] A drunk guy staggers into a bar and orders a beer.

He goes up to the barman and shouts, "Wow! There are A LOT of hot women in here".

Filled with Dutch courage, the guy says, "I bet you 50 bucks I can go up to any hottie in here, squeeze her boobs, slap her ass and still get her number!"

The barman agrees and they put their money under ...

Two friends checking out women

Two friends are checking out women, when one of them said: “you see that hottie over there? I have slept with her!” “Really?” His friends asks him. “Yeah man, and she’s much better then my girlfriend!” He replies: “well, I slept with her also, but she’s not better then your girlfriend!”

Ebola, Sars and Covid walk into a bar...

Suddenly all the hotties from Pfizer, Moderna, AstraZeneca, Janssen, Sinovac and Novavax surround Covid.

Ebola asks Sars, "Why is Covid getting all the attention?"

Sars replies, "This is what happens when you go viral."

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I'm going to make a calendar of sexy Islamic extremists

I will call it, Ji-hotties

A few jokes...

1. Why do dogs wag their tails? Because no one else will do it for them.
2. A zombie got a new girlfriend. He introduces her to his friend, who says: "Wow, she's a hottie. Where did you dig her up?"
3. Image living in an ice globe city. The weather reports would be interesting: "Chance of an ...

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Three handsome male dogs are walking down the street when they see a beautiful, and enticing Poodle.

The three male dogs fall all over themselves in an effort to be the one to reach her first, but end up arriving in front of her at the same time.


The males are speechless before the hottie, slobbering on themselves and hoping for just a glance from her in return.


Aware of her c...

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Your last spring break?

Three students are sitting in an apartment.

One of them asks: "Where did you spend your last spring break?"

Another replies: "I was in Monaco, partying with the biggest hotties in the world.".

The first one then tells him: "I was gambling in Las Vegas, and I won over 5 million ...

Haven't posted for a while, so here it goes... A wild rabbit is captured...

and taken to a laboratory. While there he befriends a rabbit who has spent his entire life at the nicotine research facility. One evening the lab assistant forgets to lock the cage, and the wild rabbit suggests an escape. "I'm not sure," says the lab rabbit. "This is the only home I know."
"Come ...

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So, there's these two tomatoes who are best friends ...

Ever since they grew up on the vine together, they've been inseparable. They played little league together, they had home room together all through high school, they even double dated to prom and shared a limo. As time went on, though, they slowly lost touch. During university they slowly lost touch...

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So there's this boy, and he really loves tractors... [xpost from funny.]

He developed an exceptional love for tractors at quite a young age. He had grown up on a farm and his father was a farmer, his father's father was a farmer, and so on. He wanted nothing more than to, one day, buy his own tractor and take over his father's jobs on the farm. The boy maintains his obse...

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