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Have Got Jokes

Friend : I have got Diabetes type 1

Me : 1

He blocked me, no idea what wrong I did.

You guys have got it all wrong, this is definitely a "peacekeeping mission".

As in Putin wants to keep a piece of Ukraine.

I told my friend i have got a new job at a bowling alley

She said "Tenpin?" I said, "No, it's a permanent job."

“Sir you have got to help!” said the tearful man at the door.

“There is a family that I know very well that is in desperate need of money. The Father has been out of a job for over a year, they have five kids at home with barely a bit of food to eat. The worst part is, that they are about to kicked out of the house and they will be left on the streets without ...

You are lying in the hospital thinking that you have got a small fever.

Then the full crew of Avengers comes to visit you.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I'm sick of reading them, these jokes have got to stop

Period.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Three men were talking about their teenage daughters: The first says "I was cleaning my daughter's room the other day and found a packet of cigarettes. I didn't even know she smoked". The second says "That's nothing.

I was cleaning my daughter's room the other day when I came across a full bottle of Vodka.
I was really shocked as I didn't even know she drank".
Then the third speaks up.
"Both of you have got nothing to worry about.
I was cleaning my daughter's room the other day and I found a packet o...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A friend told me this, and he might have got it from reddit so this might be a repost but here it goes [Long]

3 best friends decide to travel to an lonely little island somewhere near the Bahamas in the hopes of having a relaxing camping trip, for old time’s sake.

They arrive by water plane, and the pilot informs them that he’ll be returning to pick them up the next day. The men, happy to finally be ...
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