Why did the great flood happen?

God didn't dam it.

A great flood happened

A man was in his home when he saw on the news that a great flood was coming and everyone in the area must get to safety. He said to himself “oh, god will provide”

The waters stared coming and he sat in his living room with water up to his ankles. After a while the water rose too high and he h...

After the great flood, Noah begins unloading the ark, and instructs the animals to "go forth and multiply!"

Once most of the exodus has completed, he noticed a pair of adders in the back looking rather distraught. "What's the matter?" he asked them.

"We're only adders, we can't multiply!" said the snakes.

Thinking quickly, Noah dashed off into the forest, and returned a short time later carr...

After the Great Flood

After the Great Flood, Noah sends the animals to go forth and multiply.

A pair of snakes stayed behind. Noah asked, why they stayed.

The pair of snakes replies “We can't multiply, we're adders” ...

so Noah builds them a log table

A priest is in a great flood...

The water level is quickly rising, but he has faith that the lord will save him. As the water is up to his knees, an old man in a rowboat sails on up.

"Hey there," he says. "Need a lift?"

The priest shakes his head. "No, for I have faith that the lord will save me. Use your boat to fin...

So the Great Flood has receded, and Noah is releasing all of the animals from the ark...

... Everything is going smoothly - the giraffes, bears, birds - all of them are going forth and repopulating the earth.

Suddenly, a pair of snakes goes up to Noah. He says "What's wrong? Go forth and multiply!"

The snakes say, "We can't. We're adders."

So Noah goes into the for...

About 4,000 years ago:

God: I shall create a great plague and every living thing on Earth will die!

Fish: *Winks at God and slips him a $20 note*

God: Correction, I shall create a great flood!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

God gathered a Jew, a Christian and a Muslim...

... and told them:
-I am tired of mankind's sins! In two weeks I'll unleash a great flood that will kill all humanity!
The Christian said:
-We have only two weeks to appease Him!
The Muslim said:
-We have only two weeks to change our ways!
The Jew said:
-We have on...

God has me covered

A farmer encounters a great flood in his village and he is forced to take refuge on the roof.

A car drives by and offers to drive him to safety, the farmer says "No...God will take care of me"

The flood gets higher and a boat comes by and offers him a ride to safety, the farmer says "N...

Hurricane Katrina

An old gentleman from New Orleans gets to heaven and is greeted by St. Peter. St. Peter says to him "You have to pick one story that describes your life and that is the only story you may tell for all of eternity."

The man thinks about it and decides he is going to tell the story of Hurrican...

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