UPJOKE
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Which brand of computer will win the Grammy's?

A dell.

My dad just won the nonexistent Grammy joke competition.

We're watching the Grammys as a family when the Sam Hunt and Carrie Underwood performance came up. We watched it in silence and then talked about the performance once it finished. My mother thought Sam Hunt looked similar to someone and thus the joke begins:

Mom: "Hmm. That guy looks like som...

Madonna is lashing back at people who commented about her appearance on the Grammys.

At least I think it’s Madonna.

As a musician, I've learned the best way to win a Grammy...

...is to not release your music in the same year as Adele.

I was watching the Grammys when something hit me

my dad

The biggest difference between the Superbowl and the Grammy's.

The Eagles have won a Grammy.

One evening a father overheard his daughter saying her prayers, "God bless Mommy, Daddy and Grammy. Goodbye Grampa."

Well, the father thought it was strange, but he soon forgot about it. The next day, the Grandfather died.

A month later the father heard his daughter saying prayers again: "God bless Mommy. God bless Daddy. Goodbye Grammy." The next day the grandmother died. Well, the father was getting mor...

I read that Logic's touching performance at the Grammys tripled calls to the suicide prevention line,

Apparently Fergie's national anthem more than quintupled them

Best Twitter handle for an older lady:

@InstaGrammy

What's the difference between Jesus Christ and Judas Priest?

One of them has a Grammy...

Never leave a job half-finished

That's what Grammy Moon used to say, right up until the man she was sent to kill got back up and shot her.

As my two-and-a-half-year old granddaughter and I are about to go out the door, I look down.

As I looked down, our 'big girl' had her shoes on backwards. So I said, "Good job putting your shoes on by yourself, Love, but you have them on the wrong feet."
She looks down.
She looks back up at me and says with big innocent eyes, "But Grammy, I don't have any other feet?!" β™‘β™‘

Roses are red.. Violets are blue...

If Rebecca Black wins a Grammy,

Kanye, you know what to do!

This joke may contain profanity. πŸ€”

A struggling rock band...

A struggling indies band from Brooklyn, The Spoonerists, was in the process of recording their debut album. The artistic sentiment of the group led them to use ambient sounds from nature in their arrangements. One of the members of the band took it upon himself to go out in to the field and make rec...

I asked my grandma what people use to think of democrats and republicans over 70 years ago

*Watching the news with my grandma*

Me: Grammy, when you were really young, did they talk about democrats and republicans, like they do today?

Grandma: What do you mean?

Me: Were they always hostile towards one another, like this lady on the news.

Grandma: Oh yeah, that's...

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