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Detroit Lions Jokes

How do you keep the Detroit Lions out of your front yard.

Put up goal posts.

And I'm a lions fan. For some damn reason.

What did the Detroit Lions fan say when they won the super bowl?

“Why, why did you wake me up? I was having such a nice dream!”

What do you call fifty guys watching the Super Bowl?

The Detroit Lions.

The Detroit Lions announced that they’re releasing their running back, Kerryon Johnson.

Needless to say, he will not Kerryon with the team.

The Detroit Lions have almost assembled a team to win the Super Bowl...

All that’s missing is a great quarterback. A scout has been looking everywhere for someone good enough, but cheap enough to keep them under the salary cap.

The scout, after a long day of searching, comes home defeated. He slumps down into his chair and decides to watch the news.

As h...

What do Billy Graham and the Detroit Lions have in common?

Both can make 20,000 people stand up and yell, "JESUS CHRIST!"

As a lifelong Detroit Lions fan, when I die, I want the team to lower my casket into the grave.

So they can let me down one last time.

A Chicago Bears' fan, a Minnesota Viking's fan, and a Detroit Lions' fan find a genie in a bar...

The 3 fans are sitting at the bar when suddenly, a genie comes out of a bottle of vodka the bartender opens.
[](/sp)
The genie says to the bartender: "Congratulations, you have released me from my prison, and to repay you for that, I shall allow you to make 3 wishes your heart most desires an...

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