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Dating Site Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I started a dating site for older people.

OK Boomer

my mum just started a dating site for chickens

She'd do anything to make hens meet

Due to the current economic situation in the world, I’ve started a dating site for chickens.

It’s not my full-time job, I’m just doing it...
...to make hens meet.

A woman on a dating site sent me a message saying, "Wow! Your gorgeous, how come your still single?"

"It's spelled 'you're'," I replied.

I joined a Ukrainian dating site

Now I have a chick in Kiev

What do you call an absolutely bizarre match on a dating site?

A tinder surprise egg

What's the name of a dating site for people with lisp?

FAITHBOOK

I joined a Christian dating site

And got Holy Ghosted

I got banned from a Christian dating site

I suppose "hung like Jesus" *was* a poor choice for a username.

LinkedIn is like reverse dating site for IT nerds

They get a lot of messages from girls

But ignore most of them

What's the most popular dating site in India?

Connect the dots.

All these dating sites are terrible for your self esteem.

If I wanted to feel neglected I’d go sit with my wife.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call an Indian Dating site?

Connect the Dots.



yeah idk don't judge i'm fucking bored

I made an account on a dating site for people with sleep apnea.

I got a couple of messages but I'm too tired to check them out.

I'm done with dating sites

I'm only dating pizza delivery guys because at least I know they have a car, a job and, pizza

What do you call a dating site for santas?

The semicolon, it connects independent clauses

Perfect Bio for any Chirstian Dating Site

I love Jesus and long walks on the water.

Have you heard about the new dating site for elderly people?

They call it Carbon-14.

Women on dating sites are so confusing!

They ask for a "genuine guy" then block you when you send.........proof

After 3 failed marriages, an old woman decides to try an online dating site..

She sets up an account with all her info and says she is looking for "a man who will not beat me, Will not walk all over me, and is great in bed." After 2 weeks no one has replied. Then, one day some one rings the doorbell. The woman gets up and opens the door to see a man with no arms and no legs s...

Did you hear about the dating site where younger men can meet older women?

It’s called Oedipal Arrangements.

How do dating sites in Alabama save money?

They link to Ancestry.com

Of all the dating sites I've tried, I found the most success on Google.

I just typed in "single girls" and got 49 million matches!

Starting a sugar daddy dating site for people into 80s music.

I'm calling it Girls Just Wanna Have Funds.

Dating Sites are all for Perverts

I was going to join a dating site, but no matter which one I tried I realized pretty quick they were supporting perverts. Disgusting! I mean, right on the form it said: Do you want children?

looking for investors for my new specialty dating site

So I'm planning on taking advantage of the huge influx of specialty dating sites like farmers only or Christian mingle, etc... I'm starting a site exclusively for Indians. It's gonna be called, "Connect the dots."
(So who's in with me???)

Did you hear about the new farmers dating site?

It's full of hoes.

Hey my name is Nathan and i'm 12 years old:) I was wondering if there was a dating site for only 12 year olds and under...

I'm not asking for myself!! My uncle was wondering

Why do dinosaurs use Christian dating sites?

Because they can lie about their age!

According to a recent study, men on dating sites are more popular if they mention dancing or cooking.

Because if there’s one thing women love, it’s a man who can lie.

Did you hear about Arnold Schwarzenegger's latest business venture - teaming up with the police to help protect kids on internet dating sites?

Guess you'd expect nothing less from a Tindergarten cop.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My dog bit my bf so I had to put him down. I am crying while going through his toys.

The motherfucker was on three dating sites. I saw it on his cellphone.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A hot single woman wants a strong relationship

She makes a post on a dating site saying that she is looking for a nice guy who wont hit her, wont run away, and is good in bed. A week later, her doorbell rings. She opens the door, looks down and sees a guy with no arms and legs in front of her .he lady is confused and asks the guy who is he and w...

Mark is 5 feet, 6 inches tall

Mark likes dating taller women.

So, Mark was so excited to find a girl on a dating site who's bio said that she is 5 feet, 10 inches tall.

He was even more excited to see that her bio said that she likes dating shorter guys.

Mark chats with this girl for a while, and they eventu...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Online dating

I thought I could get a nude pic from a girl I met on a dating site recently by starting first. So, I sent a pic of my eyes and she sent back a pic of her smile. I sent a pic of my 6 pack and she sent back a pic of her flat stomach. I sent a pic of my firm ass and she sent back a pic of her 9” penis...

Coronavirus is serious business

I scoffed at how serious the Coronavirus was being portrayed.

Then I realized that I haven’t been invited to the Russian, Ukrainian, or Asian dating sites in my junk folder in weeks!

findafamilymember.com

Now the #1 Dating Site in Texas!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Wedding night (slightly offensive to kangaroos)

An American woman of 40 wants to get married, but she is only willing to marry a man if he has never been (sexually) with another woman. After several unsuccessful years of searching, she decides make a profile on a dating site.

She ends up corresponding with a man who has lived his entir...

I would like to thank President Donald Trump on behalf of my wife...

suddenly the thousands I invested into Canadian dating sites wasn't so worthless after all.

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