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Dark Web Jokes

What do the dark web and submarines have in common?

They're both home to Tor-pedos.

I was in a band called Dark Web.

We was always on tor.

Who writes the most frightening tales from the dark web?

... HTTP Lovecraft

A doctor is selling his victims on the dark web. He shows up to the location and no one is there. The doctor waits for hours. When the buyer shows up...

They say "Thank you for your patients"

I got myself a Crypto wallet and surfed the Dark Web, seeing what illicit "goods and services" were available, if you know what I mean?.

Chuffed to bits. Managed to get an appointment with a GP.

What do you call skid marks on Spider-Man underwear?

The Dark Web

What do you call a river amphibian that spends a lot of time on the dark web?

Haxolotl

I went and tried to buy a toaster on the Dark Web

One of them was called the "Bath Bomb."

I know this guy who teaches people how to access the Dark Web, but if they're incompetent then he physically and psychologically abuses them

He's a Tor mentor.

I recently won the hand of the daughter of the local butcher.

I stil can't believe some of these cannibal auctions on the Dark Web.

Where does the spider get his weapons?

The dark web...





(Like where my parents will be selling me)

What does Spiderman use when he wants to be stealthy?

The Dark Web

What do you call it when a blind person goes on the internet?

The Dark Web.

Do you want to watch the movie "Venom", about Spider-Man's archenemy, before it hits theaters? Easy!

You just have to navigate the dark web...

Aboriginal Rituals

A couple years back, I stumbled on a surprising reference to the astonishing longevity of Aboriginal shamans living in the Australian outback. Reliable birth records aren't available before the early 20th century, but government officials have noted an astounding number of nonagenarians and centenar...

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