What did the clockmaker say when he finished making a clock?

"It's about time".

What did the German clockmaker say to the clock that would only go "tick-tick-tick"?

"Vee hav vays of making you tok".

A clockmaker retires and moves to a small village

Not having much to do, he opens a small shop mostly just to have a place to keep all of his favorite clocks that he's collected over the years. Not needing to hustle any more, he spends most of his day gazing out his shop window watching people go by.

Every morning he sees a man stop, stare ...

A chef, a clockmaker, and a thief walk into a bar, but the bartender says he doesn't get the joke.

They all say, "It's okay, these things take thyme."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Man with a speech impediment goes shopping...

First he goes to the bakers, "can I have a bum please?" he asks. "Do you mean a bun?" Says the baker. "Yes," the man replies, buys the bun and gets on his way...

Next he goes to the electrical store, "can I have a sucket please?" he asks. "Do you mean a socket?" Says the shop assistant. "...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.