I finally discovered why my program kept crashing: I had a pointer that walked off the end of a char array.

It entered uncharred territory.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why did Trump hold his press conference at the 4-seasons garden centre, between a sex shop and a crematorium?

Because he was between a cock and a charred place.

What do you call a charred exotic psychic?

A rare medium well done.

One time my cousin called me after a night of drinking...

"Hey man I just woke up in some desert and have no idea where I am! You gotta help me!"

I took a deep breath and said "Relax bud lets figure this out. Look around you what sort of things do you see?"

He told me it was pretty much all sand around him minus some rocks, mountains in the d...

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The FBI, Interpol and Mumbai police are having a competition as to who is the best detective squad.

The test is simple. They leave a rabbit into the woods and the team who finds the rabbit in the fastest time wins.

Interpol goes first. They go into the forest, hunt for clues, interrogate the animals, set a trap for the rabbit at its favorite watering hole and within a month, they have captu...

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An metropolitan Police officer gets demoted to Traffic duty in the middle of nowhere...

He’s furious about it. He sits in his car at the side of the highway, mumbling to himself angrily about his demotion, until he finally snaps. He turns on his lights and pulls over the first car that passes him. Slamming his door behind him, he marches up to the car and pounds on the window.
...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A trucker is driving down a random stretch of highway

He happens upon a billboard while driving that reads...

Peaches, engineered for your taste!
Only 10 miles!

Mildly intrigued, the driver decides to check out what this means. "Engineered for my tastes, what bullshit!", he says.

Driving for the next couple miles, he final...

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Three best friends have known eachother since high school...

They ended up going to the same college together, and getting a job at the same factory together. Bill, Jacob, and Mark were always known to hangout together, they were inseparable.

One day, the factory catches on fire, and once all of the factory workers regroup, they do accountability. Two...

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and an Imam go golfing...

The imam tees off first. He completely shanks the drive. "Fuck!" he screams, "I missed!" The priest turns to the imam and says "My friend, you must watch you language. If you continue to swear God will rain his wrath upon you". The others tee off without further incident.

On the fairway, the ...

What is a European dragon’s favorite food?

Swiss charred.

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Ole and Sven get called into the morgue....

Lars's house had burned down and a charred body was found among the wreckage. The sheriff, knowing that Ole and Sven were good buddies of Lars, called them down to identify the body. Ole goes in first and the sheriff asks him "So is this Lars?" and Ole says "Well I'm not sure now. Could ya flip h...

So this guy is driving down a dirt road...

..and while he's driving he sees this 8 year old boy on the shoulder by himself just crying his eyes out. Naturally, this guy pulls over and asks him what's wrong and why he's all alone. All he can manage to say between sobs is "...my parents.." as he points to the canyon below. The guy looks over t...

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I have a similar Russian joke I'll translate to English as best as I can

A son comes home from school with a note from the principal, and is met by his dad.

"Dad, the principal asked you to meet him soon."

"Why? What happened?"

"Well, during PE today I threw a dodgeball wrong and it smashed the trophy cabinet and now it needs to be replaced."

...

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