Body Builder Jokes

A blonde says, "Wow, what a great chest you have!" He says, "100lbs of dynamite, babe!" He takes off his pants and the blonde says "What massive calves you have!" He replies, "That's 100lbs of dynamite, babe!" He then removes his underwear and the blonde runs off screaming in fear. He puts his cloth... read more

There was no other whey.

Blind dude: I feel you.

Because he wanted to get cut

To increase flex-ability

After they were done, they sat together in the locker room.

One turned to the other and said, "I'm sore, eh?"

The other said, "What for?"

Apparently lots of mcdonald's along with everything else I eat wasn't what he would've assumed.

Able to lift twice the weight of anyone else around, he routinely boasted about how he was the greatest and everyone else was beneath him while drinking his huge container of protein shake.

One day, after seeing a new extremely attractive woman at the gym, he decided to show off some more by... read more

There ain't no whey!

These are not the ‘roids you are looking for.

I'm sorry you *fuel* that way

So I told him I was pregnant.

No Whey Jose!

It's just soda pressing

A dictionary, so they get plenty of definition.

aTrophy

He puts a dollar in the slot and enters. There is a jogging track with a beautiful naked woman wearing jogging shoes. "Better start running" she says, beckoning him. Excited, he chases her around the track for an hour. Finally he catches her, she... ahem... rewards him... then he steps on the scale.... read more

have devoted their lives to power-lifting and they just found out that certain protein supplements have become illegal. Just as one was about to sip on his protein shake, the other smacks it out of his hand and yells: "No whey, Jose!"

Their guilt.

The first man, a body builder, is brought up to the stage and announces that he can deadlift 550lbs and can bench 315lbs. Proving it true, the man completes the lifts with ease. Flexing his muscles in front of the women and winking, he leaves the stage.

The next man, a professional chef, impr... read more

And says, "I'll give a thousand bucks to whoever can squeeze another drop from this lemon." All the strongest men in the bar took turns trying, but nobody could even squeeze a single drop. The bartender thought he'd won, when an thin, wiry old man walked up from the back. He grabbed the lemon, and s... read more

Normal Zombies: BRAAINNNNSSS!!
Vegetarian Zombies: GRAAINNNNSSS!!
Body Builder Zombies: GAAINNNNSSS!!
Plumber Zombies: DRAAINNNNSSS!!
Conductor Zombies: TRAAINNNNSSS!!
Weatherman Zombies: RAAINNNNSSS!!
Gamer Zombies: GAMMMMESSS!!
Depressed Zombies: PAINNNNSSS!! ... read more

... I mean, the guy was an amazing body builder.

The man dusts off the ancient lamp and out comes a genie!

The genie says to the man:

"you have awoken me from my slumber! I will grant you 3 wishes as a reward for finding me."

The man responds to the genie with great excitement

"Oh man thank you so much, I don't know whe... read more

A blind man goes into a restaurant and sits down at a table. He orders something to drink and says to the waiter "Do you want to hear a blonde joke?"

The waiter replies, "Well, actually sir, I am a blonde. And there is a man just over at the bar who is an ex-con with a violent streak and he i... read more

After a few drinks he starts telling the bartender a blonde joke. As soon as he starts the bartender stops him and says: "hey, before you tell the joke, just so you know. I'm a blonde, 200lb body builder, the blonde girl next to you is a kung fu artist, the other blonde girl is a wrestler and there ... read more

A truck owned by a commercial glue company is driving through London when it accidentally collides with a lamp post, causing it to swerve out of control and flip on its side. During this collision, the tank holding the glue explodes and 1000kg of glue falls upon a poor pedestrian. He's firmly stuck ... read more

A muscular man was walking on the beach one day looking for girls and no one would give him the time of day. He was about to give up when he saw a pale, skinny ginger in a speedo surrounded by beautiful women, laughing, hanging on his every word. When they left, the frustrated body builder walked ov... read more

..are literal body builders.