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6ft Jokes

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6ft Asshole

So I was headed to work this morning and I was running late. I had the cruise set at 80mph and I crested a hill and there sits a cop running his radar.
Needless to say, he lights me up and I get pulled over.
Cop walks up and asks, "What's the rush... Where you headed in such a hurry?"
"I'm ...

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what did the 6ft parrot say?

polly wants a cracker and he wants it fucking now!

A butcher is 6ft tall, and wears size 10 shoes, what does he weigh?

Meat

What do you do with a 6ft Ahole?

I man was late for work and speeding to his job. He came over the hill of a bridge and found himself in a speed trap. The cop pulls him over and walks up to his car.
Cop: sir why were you speeding?
Man: I'm late for work
Cop: what do you do that's so important you think you can speed?
Ma...

What do you call a gem 6ft under the ground?

My grandmother.

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A guy driving along gets pulled over by a traffic cop for going 1 mph over the limit

The guy steps out of his car and the cop asks in a sarcastic tone why he his so important to be driving that fast.
The guy replies carefully that he is on his way to his next job. "Oh yeah " the cop replies " and what is that President?"
"No" the guy replies "I'm a rectum stretcher"
"O...

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What do you do with a 6ft asshole?

While speeding down the road yesterday, a woman passed over a bridge only to find a cop with a radar gun on the other side waiting to catch speeders.

The cop pulled her over, walked up to the car, with that classic patronizing smirk we all know and love, and asked, "What’s your hurry?"
...

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I heard a knock at the door this morning, and when I answered it, a 6ft tall cockroach-looking thing was standing there, clearly very angry. He called me a prick and then punched me right in the face!

Apparently theres a nasty bug going around

In a tailoring class, the teacher asked her students how long should a miniskirt be for a person who is 6ft in height and waist is 34.

One of the students replied: Short enough to have the interest and long enough to hide the interest.

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3 Irish men in a pub…

… called Mick, Pat and Tat. The barman says "Are you all related?"

Mick said "Yeah we're triplets!"

Barman said "Triplets!, how come you and Pat are 6ft tall and Tat is only 4ft tall?",

"Well!" said Mick "Me and Pat were
breast fed so there was no tit for Tat!

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An Irish Skydiver

Paddy was telling Mick about his first sky-dive.

When I got to the door of the plane I just couldn't jump so the 6ft 7inch black instructor unzips his fly and says: 'If you don't jump you're getting this baby right up your arse!' "

Mick asks: "Did you jump?"

Paddy replies: "A l...

Jim is a butcher. Has a sister named Delores. He stands 6ft tall and wears a 10 gallon hat. What does he weigh?

Meat hes a butcher.

Blind guy walks into a bar

A blind man walks into a bar, and after getting a little tipsy he says to the bartender.
“Hey, do you want to hear a blond joke”

The bartender then replies “well before you start your joke there is a few things you need to know ... I’m blond 6ft 3 and im also an amateur boxer, my other fri...

Have you heard of the ancient Amazonian tribe known as the Fugawi?

The average height of each adult was about 4ft, and they lived in an area with tall grass that would reach up to 6ft. They were know for jumping up and down in the grass fields announcing "We're the Fugawi! We're the Fugawi!"

Social Distancing is so unbelievably stupid

If corona came from China, surely it can go another 6ft.

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I wake up at around 7am to hear this pounding at my door as if it’s about to cave in

So I open the door and I see this 6ft cockroach. Before I can even ask him how’s he doing he picks me up and flings me across the hallway of my house. Moving at rapid speed he’s got me in a headlock and delivers some devastating punches. I’m gutted to say I passed out from the sheer pain. Next day w...

Flat Earth

Flat earthers are concerned that 6ft social distancing will push some people over the edge

What is the difference between Disneyland Paris and Disneyland Chernobyl

The 6ft tall Mouse is real.

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Turner brown

A dwarf was riding an elevator.
In comes a big man.
The man says: I’m 6ft 5 tall, I’m 3ft 9 wide, my dick is 15 inches long and my name is Turner Brown.
The dwarf passed out. When he woke up, he said “what was the last thing you said?”
The big man answered, I said “my name is Turner B...

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Man got pulled over for speeding

A man was late for work and was pulled over by a cop hiding at the end of a bridge. The cop asked "Where you
going in such a hurry?" The man tells the cop that he is just heading to work. "What do you do?" the cop asked. "I'm a rectum stretcher" he replied. "What on earth does a rectum stretcher...

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Intelligent life

The U.N. wanted to contact other worlds in hopes of finding intelligent life in the vast of space. So they gathered all of earth greatest minds to work together to complete such a task. After years of failing to reach life in space, the program was starting to crumple and the top minds abandoned shi...

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We are getting there

A man walks into the bathroom and takes his position at the urinal. He is joined by a 6ft tall black man.

Going about his business he accidentally looks over and is amazed at the size of his neighbours johnson.

Both men go to wash their hands and the first man leans over and says. "Tel...

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