With my time machine, I traveled back to 1945 to show the inventor of Doc Martens my shiny new boots...

Do you think I created a Pair O' Docs?

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

1945 and a reporter spots a few of the 1st Battalion English paratroopers at a pub.

Eager for a scoop he buys them a round and asks about their first jump. All but one say "piss off wanker" The remaining trooper downs the ale and stares off into nothing. The reporter buys another drink for him and asks what it was like. The shaking man says "They just took us up, we hitched our cor...

What do you call terrorists born between 1945 and 1964?

Ka-boomers

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Hitler died in 1945, Donald Trump was born in 1946...

Coincidence? No.

Mystery? Maybe.

Hotel? Trivago.

During 1945, 2 Russian pilots crashed their plane

On the radio, their last words were.

“Hey Ivan you always say you want make joke at your dying breath, what is it?” Said the co-pilot.

The pilot turns around

“Nothin’ much, just that we are Stalin’. “

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Ash Wednesday circa 1939 to 1945

Ash Wednesday under Nazi Germany was celebrated very differently. The Nazis celebrated the Reich way.

The year is 1945...

The Soviet army is pushing closer to Berlin with each day. As they march closer, they start to find the concentration camps. In one of these camps, a Polish man with a limited knowledge of the Russian language is talking to Russian military officers about the camps, with assistance from a translator...

1945. Lenin's ghost comes to visit Stalin

Stalin tells the undead Lenin: "See, comrade Lenin, you doubted that the Soviet people will follow me, but in fact they do!"
To which Lenin replies: "Increase the food rations, or else the Soviet people will follow me".

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I'm hoping for a peaceful transition of power if Trump looses.

Just like Germany did in April 30, 1945.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The colonel rides again...

There was a knock on the door and the colonel opened it to see a young woman standing there. “I don’t know if you remember me colonel ...”. “Course I do gel, you’re from the village, Jenkins’ daughter, went off to university, well done, what can I do for you”? “Well, I’m in my last year now, studyin...

I filled out a job application form. It asked for Hobbies and Pastimes ...

I put Football, Travel and 1939-1945.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Ruin a quote by attributing it to the wrong person

"Don't cry because it is over. Smile because it happened." -Adolf Hitler, 1945

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A teacher said to her class, "Let's review some American history..."

"...Who said: 'Give me Liberty, or give me Death?'"

She saw a sea of blank faces, except for Little Akio, a bright foreign exchange student from Japan, who had his hand up:

"Patrick Henry, 1775," he answered.

"Very good! Who said: 'Government of the People, by the People, for t...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An old Jewish man was dying of cancer in his late 80s.

When the time came and he had just few hours left, he was in his bed and asked his wife Marry if she was by his side. She answered “yes darling”.

“Marry do you remember when we were in our teens and the Second World War started, you were by my side.”

“Yes I was” replied Marry

“A...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Another little Johnny joke

Little Johnny's teacher told the class that they were going to be quizzed about US presidents. Every correct answer will win that student a jellybean.

Teacher: Who was our 1st president?

Nobody raised their hands except the little Japanese boy in the front row

Boy: George Wa...

We don't call them gas chambers.

We call them surprise mechanics.

- Nuremberg Trials 1945

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

If my ancestors hadn't managed to escape from Nazi Germany, I probably wouldn't exist.

They went to Argentina in 1945.

Two old men were sitting quietly in a bar.

“When was the last time you made love to a woman?” the first man asked.

“It was 1945,” replied the other.

“My goodness!” exclaimed the first man. “That’s a long time ago.”

“Not really,” said the other man, glancing at his watch. “It’s only twenty past eight now.”

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

In an 3rd grade American class room...

The teacher is discussing U.S. presidents.

"Who gave the Gettysburg Address?" she asked the class.

Immediately a hand shot up belonging to a female Japanese foreign exchange student.

"Yes?" the teacher asked.

"Abraham Lincoln! 1863!" replied the girl proudly.

"That...

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm?

The August 1945 atomic bombings of Hiroshima and Nagasaki.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

History lesson

A teacher was attempting to teach American history to her elementary students. She said I will give you a famous quotation from history and I want all who know who said it and when to raise their hand. She said "Give me liberty or give me death." The only one that raised a hand was a Japanese boy. S...

A Finnish Soldier...

In the winter war in 1945 is getting in line for a rifle. The man behind the counter says "sorry, the guy in front of you got the last one. Here, take this hockey stick, and if you see a Russian, point it at him and yell BANG!" The Finn finds this ridiculous but takes it, thinking he'll just fix a b...

What did you do in the war?

USSR, september, 1945. A teacher asks his class what were they doing during the war. Little Masha said she was helping nurses in a hospital, little Boris says he worked in a factory. Little Vova said he was helping artillerists by bringing them shells. Amazed, the teacher asks if the soldiers ever s...

The leaders of the Big Three after the conference in Yalta

After WW2 in 1945 the leaders of the Big Three(USA, UK and the Soviet Union) respectively Roosevelt, Churchill and Stalin met in Yalta for a conference to decide the fate of the world.

After the conference they wanted to have some fun. They decided to try and make the Persian cat in the resid...

The Most Messed Up Joke Ever

It's 1945 and two Jewish kids are sitting on a roof near a chimney. A man walks by and asks "What are you guys doing up there?". The two kids say "Waiting for our parents."

Old Soviet joke

On September 1, 1945, a second grade teacher asks her students who have war medals to share how they have helped the war effort.

A little girl raises her hand.

"Yes, Tanechka" says the teacher, "do you have something to share?"

Tanechka says "I was in the hospital helping to dre...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.