UPJOKE
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Yoo Jokes

A man named Naver fell in love with a woman named Yoo

After a while of awkward conversations, Naver confessed his love to Yoo. Yoo accepted, and they started dating. It started small, going to the movies, and eventually they moved in with eachother.
Eventually, they got married, had a massive wedding, inviting all of their friends, family, and the...

What is Mario’s favorite brand of chocolate milk?

Yoo-hoo

A salesman flies to Vegas for a convention.

He’s driving down the strip when he sees a hooker who tells him, “Yoo Hoo! I’m selling!” They strike a bargain and do the big nasty.

When he returns home, he discovers he’s contracted gonorrhea. He’s on medication for the rest of the year. But the convention rolls around again and he flies ba...

"Knock knock!"

who's there?

"You!"

You who?

"YooHoo Big summer blow out!"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Ed Zachary

A man goes to see an asian sex therapist because he can't figure out why he can't get a girlfriend and have sex. The therapist says, "Take off yoo crose and craw on rug reery fass!" The man does what he's told and he crawls naked on the floor. The therapist says, "Stop! I have diagnosis. Yoo have Ed...

a joke from the war

a man is flying a combat mission over Europe. He gets shot down and has to bail out. He breaks both his legs, is captured by Germans, then taken to a POW camp.
The first week they have to amputate his right leg. He asks one of them "After you're done, can you have one of your pilots fly my leg ...

Two Scottish women are visiting Canada..

When they come across a skunk.
“Ahh look a’this wee thing, it’s well cute!”
“Aye a know but leave it be”
“No but I think I wantit like yoo know as a pet”
“Y’canny be serious lass?”
“I’m taking it home wimme!”
“What on the plane an all?”
“Aye”
“Ach, where y’gonna put it?”
...

Authorities have released the name of the United passenger from yesterday's incident

Soo Yoo

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

So, there's a guy sitting on the bench in the park.

He looks frustrated and he's whispering to himself: "F\*\*k this. Shit!!."

His friends observes this and comes to him and asks: "Yoo, what happened? What's wrong?"

He turn to his friend: "Do you really wanna know? Take a sit, and I will tell you all about it."

His friend sits ne...

Ole the Norwegian Insurance Salesman

Ole, the smoothest Norske in the Minnesota National Guard and a natural born salesman, got called up to active duty. Ole's first assignment was in a military induction center. Because he was a good talker, they assigned him the duty of advising new recruits about government benefits, especially the ...

Whilst laying in bed with my girlfriend I turned to her to say "I love you so"...

She replied, "I love you so too!"

We then proceeded to discuss how one could not love Yoo So, for our Chinese friend is nothing but a delight to be around!

*Works better said aloud.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Super man was flying over metropolis and saw Louis Lane (nsfw)

Laying on her roof naked. Super man thought “I’m so fast I can fly down get me a little Yoo-hoo from my lady love and be gone before anyone sees me.” So Superman does just that, flys down gets him some action, kisses her on the cheek and flys off before anyone knows he is there. Louis being totally...

A drunken man walks down the street when he spots a drunken lady sat on the floor with a sack!

The man slurs his words and asks " Whaat ave yoo got in thaat sack!"

the woman slurs back " Hedgehogss, Ive got hedghogs in myy sack! "

He says " hhow mmmany, howw many hedgehogs ave you got in therre!!"

She says " i'm, i'm not gunna tell ya"

The man says " If i can tel...

Lonely guy...

Sophie and Shirley, two elderly widows in a Florida adult

community, are curious about the latest arrival in their

building -- a quiet, nice looking gentleman who keeps to

himself.

Shirley says," Sophie, you know I'm shy. Why don't you go

over to him at the p...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A hippie enters the bus...

Upon entering the bus he spots a nun in the back sitting quietly. He comes up to her and says:
.

-Yoo girl wanna have sex ?
.

The nun started screaming and left at the next bus stop. Te bus driver saw that, called the hippie and said
.

-Hey man, I know a way you can ha...

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