UPJOKE
sugarysugarinesspuddingsugardessertcandyaspartamesweetnessdulcetconfectionsweetishsaccharinesyrupypleasingcarbohydrate

Sweeter Jokes

There’s nothing sweeter than a baby’s laughter…

Unless it’s 3am.

And you’re home alone.

And you don’t have a baby.

Once upon a time, in the magical fantasy kingdom, there lived a young monk named Sam.

His order was renowned for their beautiful choral singing. They trained, hours every day, refining their voices and their art. Their song floated down the mountainside, enriching the lives and souls of the townspeople below.

Sam was particularly gifted, and on his 19th birthday, in mid-song,...

A man walks into a pub, and requests a pint of Guinness

A man walks into a pub, and requests a pint of Guinness only to be told by the bar staff, "I can't give you a pint of Guinness, the bats will get you".

Confused by this he heads a few doors down to another pub and to his astonishment is told the same thing;

"I can't give you a pint of ...

Stage Fright

A young actor, new on the scene and nervous about it, is trying to make his first big role count.

In his first onstage appearance, his character has a fairly simple scene to pull off: he walks onstage holding a rose between his fingers. He waves it past his nose with a big whiff, then declar...

Aristidi and Manolis

In the village there's a girl, Aristidi, whose mother really wants to marry her off. It turns out she likes the neighbor, Manolis, so the mother invites him over for a visit, hoping the kids will hit it off. She tells Aristidi to go make conversation... which isn't her strong suit.

\- Aristid...

My taste in women is much like my taste in wine

Right now i like them younger, sweeter, and prettier. As i age, i start to like them older, more bitter, and contributing to my alcoholism.

While reading an article last night about fathers and sons, memories came flooding back to the time I took my son out for his first beer.

Off we went to our local pub only two blocks from home.

I got him a Guinness. He didn't like it, so I drank it. Possibly too strong a taste, so I bought him a Worthington's, he didn't like that either, so I drank it.

Possibly something lighter? I thought he might like a local lager...

A man gets shipwrecked at sea

After what felt like days floating on wreckage he washes up on an unknown shore.

He starts to wander around the beautiful land, the air smelled sweeter than any air he’d ever breathed, everything looked clearer than real life. His hunger suddenly hits him and he wished for a big sandwich and...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

How is pussy like veal?

It tastes sweeter the younger it is.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A World War II Pun

A German child was playing outside. Eventully, he was so exhausted that he went inside and asked his mother for a drink. She brings him a cup of water. After a sip, he asks "Mother, why can't I have something sweeter?" She replies, "I couldn't give you anything else because our Führer does not want ...

A man goes to the doctor.

He tells the doctor he's been hearing strange buzzing noises all week. The sounds come and go at all times of day, but they have been most intense at night. Sometimes there are multiple distinct buzzes at a time, at different frequencies. The patient says he has hardly slept for the past week becaus...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.