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Russell Crowe Jokes

Russell Crowe & Sheryl Crow walk into a bar…

The bartender calls 911, "I need to report an attempted murder!"

Me: A cannibal once took my sister to see a Russell Crowe movie

Friend: Gladiator?

Me: No I really miss her.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Russell Crowe never regrets cunnilingus

He'll always be Gladiator.

Russell Crowe showed no remorse after cannibalising his wife.

In fact, he seemed like he was Gladiator.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Russell Crowe never really liked performing cunnilingus on a woman but after having tried it for the first time...

he was gladiator.

What did Russell Crowe say when he went down on his girlfriend?

I don't know, but he was Gladiator

What did Russell Crowe say when he found out that his ex-wife was eaten by a cannibal?

I'm gladiator.

A guide to waking up in the morning

Step 1: Buy a rooster

Step 2: Name it Russell

Step 3: Fall asleep

Step 4: Wake up to Russell Crowe

A bunch of Hollywood celebrities formed two baseball teams...

...to raise money for a charity.

The day of the match arrived and everyone was ready. The celebrities were dressed in their outfits, some practising their throws and catches, others practising their swing. Russell Crowe was selected to umpire.

The match started, and the two teams, "The...

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