Rene Descartes walks into a bar

The bartender asks “do you want a drink?”

Descartes replies “I think not,” and vanishes.

Rene Descartes comes into a bar

He orders a really old and expensive bottle of wine and after a couple of hours when he's done drinking it, he stands up from his chair, planning to leave. The bartender stops him: "Sir you have to pay for this!", Rene stops and says "I don't think so" and dissappears.

Have you guys heard about this remake of the old Jim Carrey/Renee Zellwegger movie, but starring mumble rappers?

It's called "Me, Myself, and My lean."

Renes Descartes goes into a bar

The barkeeper asks him: "You want a beer?"

Descartes agrees and after that he drinks many more.

Later when he is quite drunk he grabs his keys and moves towards his car.

The barkeeper stops him from entering the car and asks him: "Do you really think, driving your state is a goo...

A horse walks in to a bar...

The bartender greets him, and says "You've been coming in here a lot. Do you think you might have a drinking problem?"

The horse pauses for a minute and says, "I think not."

And immediately disappears.



See, this joke plays on the famous Rene Descartes philosophical quot...

Rene Descartes goes to a restaurant and orders a cheeseburger.

The waiter says, "Would you like fries with that, sir?"

Rene Descartes replies, "I think not," and ceases to exist.

Rene De Carte Walks into A Bar

Rene Descarte walks into a bar.

The bartender asked if he wanted a drink.

Descarte responded with “I think not”

Descarte disappears

Edited: fixed name

Rene Descartes is having dinner alone at a restaurant...

...when he finishes his meal, the waiter approaches and says "and will monsieur be having dessert?"

"I think not" Descartes replies.

Poof! He disappears.

So Rene points to Gorgias in the schoolyard and says, "you're a stupid solipsist...".

...and Gorgias says, "I know you are but what I am."

A horse walks into a bar, and orders a drink.

He finished it, and the bartender asks if he wants another one. The horse replies “I think not” and disappears.

This joke is normally told with Rene Descartes as the subject, but to tell you that one first is to put Descartes before the horse.

A guy walks into a bar. The bartender is a horse.

He says, "Oh, hey Rene, you want the usual?". Rene says "Yeah sure. Why the long face?". The horse and bar disappear because they were never, in fact, real and the only thing that definitely did exist was Rene.

You see it's a joke about Rene Descartes, but if I told you that at the beginnin...

A horse walks into a bar; the bartender asks, "Hello, do you want a beer?" The horse responds, "I think not," and promptly disappears.

Now, admittedly, this joke only makes sense if you are familiar with the French Enlightenment philosopher, Rene Descartes, who famously said, "I think, therefore I am." The horse thought not, and therefore wasn't...

But if I had explained that first, I would have been putting Descartes before...

Mr. Stark, I'm not feeling so good...

Rene Descartes get home from work.

Wife: You forgot groceries again!?

Descartes: I'm sorry honey, I wasn't thinking.

*Descartes slowly fades from existence*

So a horse walks into a bar...

So a horse walks into a bar. The barkeep seems to know that the horse frequently goes to bars, and he asks the horse, "Aren't you an alcoholic by now?"

The horse replies, "I think not!" and disappears, seemingly into thin air.

See, the joke here is based on Rene Descartes' famous phi...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Estelle and Murray's 47th wedding anniversary was coming up,

and Estelle wanted to make it extra special for Murray.

"Murray", she said, "You never do anything fun for yourself."

"What do you mean, Estelle? I go bowling all the time."

"That's still so boring though. I want to spice things up for you. You deserve it. We've been together al...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.