This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An old Soviet communist lies on his death bed, on the verge of death.

His friends are gathered around him all somber. The old man turns to one of them and says,

"Dimitri, remember in 1921 you were almost executed? Well, you should know that I ratted you out to the Cheka. I hope you forgive me."

"Oh comrade, it is In the past and all is forgiven" says Dim...

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The Golf Fairy

A man was playing 18 holes by himself. On the 15th tee he hooked his ball into some buttercups along the left of the fairway. Being an honorable man, he penalized himself one stroke and moved his ball out of the pretty flowers.

Then a fairy appeared. She said “Thank you for moving your ball o...

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The similarity between banks and sex ...

Either way you are getting fucked and early withdrawal is always penalized.

What do you call a Soviet penal battalion?

A suicide squat

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Why did the prostitute get kicked off the hockey team?

She kept getting penalized for hooking.

What happens if you’re caught peeing in public?

You’ll be arrested for violating the penal code.

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A collection of lawyer jokes.

My grandfather was a lawyer & judge and had a fantastic sense of humor. He has many humorous law books, and the following are some his favorite selections from Larry Wilde's book *The Ultimate Lawyers Joke Book*. Hope you enjoy..

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Do you sell a book "How to get rich in three months"?

Clerk: "Yes we do sir, can I recommend another book with that, other buyers have found it very useful?"

Guy: "Of course, I would gladly take a look, what is it?"

Clerk: "Penal Code - Commented edition"

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