A parachutist is about to drop from a plane tommorow as part of a military excercise..
His mother calls him at midnight and with terror in her voice she says: Do not go tommorow!! I saw a terrible dream, your parachute was not working and you were killed!! Please dont do it!!! The soldier was terrified about his mothers dream but he still got into the plane. As the persons where...
How does a blind parachutist know when he's near the ground?
The lead on his guide dog goes slack.
A parachutist is plummeting to Earth
Because her ripcord malfunctioned.
As she frantically pulls at the defective cord, she passes a man atop a stove traveling the opposite way.
She yells out to him, “Hey, do you know how to fix a parachute!?”
He replies back “No! Do you know anything about repairing gas lines??”
Why do women parachutists wear jock straps?
So they don't whistle on the way down.
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
A Parachutist Couple
The husband says, "Shit! I packed your shoes instead of my parachute!"
The wife says, "Fuck! I packed your underwear!"
The husband says, "I love you! I need a new pair..."
How to blind parachutist know they're close to the ground?
The feel the leash go slack!
(heard this one while listening to some irish tunes)