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Necrophilia Jokes

life without love is meaningless..

Love without life is necrophilia.

I once upset a girl I knew who was into necrophilia she told me I should...

...kill myself. I don't know if she was threatening me or hitting on me.

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Most of the dirty jokes I see on this sub are either about necrophilia, bestiality, or masturbation. They used to be funny.

But at this point, they're beating off a dead horse.

Necrophilia is a lot like having a beer...

there's nothing like popping open a cold one!

Necrophilia

.... the last nail in the coffin.

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My friend is into necrophilia, pedophilia and beastiality.

It’s not as bad as it sounds, he just fucks scrambled eggs.

What's the one thing worse than necrophilia?

Letting a dead body go to waste.

What does necrophilia and alcoholism have in common?

The irresistible urge to crack open a cold one.

What’s the difference between necrophilia, and choke fetish’s?

Eh, about 15 seconds.

I used to be into sadism, bestiality and necrophilia!

But then I figured I was just flogging a dead horse.

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What’s a good title for necrophilia porn?

Good mourning.

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"I'm into homosexual necrophilia."

...Tom said, in dead earnest.

Necrophilia is a topic we don't know much about.

So if you've been a victim of it, please speak up.

Why does r/Jokes love necrophilia?

Because some of these jokes should have been dead a long time ago.

Necrophilia is dead boring

Incest is better, it's only relatively boring

At what point does CPR become necrophilia?

When you both get hard.

What's the worst part about Necrophilia?

The awkward silence.

Why is necrophilia and ice cream similar?

It doesn't matter if it's soft or hard. All that matters is that it remains cold.

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Is it necrophilia if they die while your having sex and you just kept going?

That's what happened to my dog

I've Been Getting Into A Kinky Combination Of Sadism, Bestiality, And Necrophilia.

But, maybe I'm just beating a dead horse.

Did you know that necrophilia is legal in some places?

I wouldn't be caught dead there!

I don't consider my self a necrophilia,

... but more of a paleontologist.

What does Necrophilia and mini golf have in common?

18 holes

Drinking in the morning is like necrophilia

It feels good even though everyone around you thinks diffrently.

Necrophilia joke

How can you tell a mortician is a necrophiliac?

He's always HARD at work.

Is necrophilia a funereal disease?

I'm dying to know.

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What did the person with necrophilia get when he saw a skeleton?

A boner

You know one of the best things about necrophilia?

You don't have to settle for just any girl with a pulse.

My wife confessed that she was into necrophilia and asked if we could try it out

I told her - over my dead body!

It looks like you are all tired of seeing me post about my kinks of sadism, zoophilia and necrophilia

I feel like I am just flogging a dead horse.

My friend is addicted to S&M, bestiality and necrophilia.

I’ve tried to help him but it’s like flogging a dead horse...


Really old joke but I’ve never seen it on here, so...

what's the best thing about necrophilia?

you don't have to bring the flowers.




it's already there.

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I'm going to make a necrophilia joke

And if the audience is dead, fuck them.

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So I guess nobody's into necrophilia humor.

Because all the jokes are fucking dead.

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A man is on trial for animal necrophilia...

The judge asks the man to explain his actions.

The man replies: "Your honor, I had no idea the cat was dead when I was fucking it."



I forgot where I heard that one but I always enjoy it.

Just found out my alcoholic uncle is into necrophilia

Gives a whole new meaning to 'cracking open a cold one.'

I feel sorry for victims of necrophilia.

They're always left with blue balls.

Necrophilia wouldn't be such a big issue...

If the victims were a little bit more outspoken.

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A government study was funded to study various sexual perversions: sado-masochism, necrophilia and bestiality.

The study was soon halted however, the researchers decided they were just beating a dead horse.

What comes after death?

A Necrophiliac

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(NSFW) Sex and feelings

A man was brought before a Judge and was charged with NECROPHILIA.(having sex with a dead person). The Judge told him, "In 20 years on the bench, I've never heard such a disgusting, immoral thing. Just give me one good reason why I shouldn't lock you up and throw away the jail keys in the toilet?"...

Good news: I recently discovered I was interested in Necrophilia.

Bad news: I'm a submissive bottom.

I didn't think it was possible for anything to be hot and cold at the same time.

Until I discovered necrophilia.

There’s a necrophiliac on the loose

Look alive people

Teacher: Class, who can tell me what "group necrophilia"means?

Little Johnny: It's a desire to crack open a cold one with the lads.

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Wanna hear an overused joke about necrophilia and bestiality?

You're just fucking a dead horse...

(Sorry if this is a repost, I heard this at school)

A man wanted me to engage in necrophilia... NSFW

I told him to drop dead

[NSFW] What’s Another Name For A Necrophiliac?

Ghost Rider

My girlfriend once asked me, what would I do if she died?

...... I guess necrophilia wasn't the right answer.

I have to tell my girlfriend that I'm not into her fetish.

She's dying to get me to try necrophilia.

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What did Bill O'Reilly say when his evening of necrophilia failed?

Fuck it! We'll do it live!

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A man goes to see a psychologist about his fetishes

The psychologist asks “so what is your problem?”

The man replies “well doctor, I’m into flagellation, beastiality, and necrophilia.”

“I’m sorry, I can’t help you,” says the doctor, “you’re flogging a dead horse.”

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A man goes to his psychiatrist ...

Doc, I know we covered it last time, but I keep having the same twisted dream every night. In these dreams I'm a sexual deviant, practicing sadism, necrophilia, and bestiality. Am I going crazy, or am I just beating a dead horse?

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Apparently, in the Dark Ages, having sex with corpses was pretty popular

But now, necrophilia is fucking dead.

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