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Music Festival Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An Irishman is talking with an American at a Music Festival

Irishman: I tell ya man it sucks that we're not allowed to bring our own beer into this festival. All of the beer here is so goddamn overpriced.

American: I know what you mean my friend, so in this case I'll help you out.

*The American pulls out a pair of binoculars and un caps the len...

What do you call a pro-choice music festival?

Bangers for Hangers

The counties of Devon and Cornwall organised a huge music festival with the reunions of both The Jam and Cream.

The festival was called off due to the two counties not being able to agree which should go on first.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Have you ever had sex at a music festival?

It's fucking in tents.

The Islamic State is hosting a music festival in Iraq.

The first annual Allahpalooza is sure to go off with a bang.

True story: I'm at a music festival with my wife and she is looking good.

I convince her to go to the port-a-potties. I ask here how high do you think the floor is off the ground. She says "I don't know, 3 inches?". I seductively ask her if she would like to accompany me in to the port-a-pottie and Join the 3 inch club. She looks at me sarcastically and says......"Oh, I'...

Why did the cops arrest the guy selling water at a music festival?

They said he was in tent to supply.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why do hippies have sex at music festivals?

Because it is intents

The death count nears 50 after scaffolding collapses and crushes fans at a rock music festival...

Eye-witnesses say there was a lot of heavy metal.

Four freshman partied too hard during a music festival and unable to make it back for their final exam the next day

As they drove back to the college, they tried to think of a good excuse. Finally, they agreed to the same story: a tire was blown in the middle of nowhere at mid night so they were stuck. They each sent the professor an email asking to retake the exam and gave the excuse. The understanding professor...

How many people at a Music Festival does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Zero, its already lit

Why did the chicken cross the road?

To get essential items!
He's not going to a friend's place or a ..music festival, will you just get off his back, a chicken needs to eat too, you know!

They tried to warn us, it's finally happening, minorities herding white people into camps.

Here in Oregon we call them "music festivals"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

NSFW - Getting a kiss might make your day, ...

Getting a kiss might make your day, but getting anal will make your hole weak.

Read this in a porta-poty at Roskilda music festival last week.

In the 70's my friend was a high class call girl

Her 'pimp' was movie star Michael Caine, he got her the highest profile jobs in the industry and she got to 'work' with a lot of famous people.

This particular time she was at the Isle of Wight music festival and had to go and 'service' some musicians, well she gets back stage and there they...

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