UPJOKE
confidencecredibilityteam spiritsufferingprofessionalismreputationeffectivenessdisciplinemoraldutyspiritstrengthmoralityvigorinability

In an attempt to boost morale, my office threw a 'Christmas in July' event today. I got to talking to my coworker from Beijing and asked him, "Why don't Chinese kids believe in Santa Claus?" He confided in me...

"Because they make the toys."

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

A colonel in the French Foreign Legion was given command of an isolated outpost in the middle of the desert.

On his first day, he had his sergeant show him around. He noticed that there was a solitary camel tied up behind the enlisted men's barracks. "Sergeant," said the colonel, "what is that camel doing there?"

"Well, sir," the sergeant answered, "the men are out here in the desert for so long, an...

What can Miles Morales do that Peter parker can't?

Hug his parents

Baby joke

A woman has a baby born with no arms or legs but only a head and torso. 5 years later, the boy asks him mom for arms for Christmas.

He wakes on Christmas morning and he gets his arms and he's so happy.

The next Christmas comes and he asks for legs so that he can be like the other kids...

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

Morale issues

A furious battle was about to begin and the captain gathered his soldiers and his three lieutenants for a final prep talk.

The first lieutenant step forward and shouted "my name is Will because when I go into battle my will hardens and I want to put the enemy down!"

He receives a cheer...

People used to be a lot more optimistic in the past, but things have taken quite a turn haven't they. The economy's uncertain, salaries are shrinking, jobs are dissipating. Morale is generally quite low nowadays.

If the elevator were invented today, it would be called the plunger.

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

Foreign Legion(long)

A Captain in the foreign legion was transferred to a desert outpost. On his orientation tour he noticed a very old, seedy looking camel tied out back of the enlisted men's barracks. He asked the Sergeant leading the tour, "What's the camel for?"

The Sergeant replied, "Well sir it's a long way...

How does an alcoholic keep up their morale?

With More ale

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

A Russian soldier is assigned to the training exercise

A Russian soldier is assigned to a squad near the front of the training exercise to replace a fallen komrat. He is warned that the training is hard with many death, and the squad members are a bit excentric, so he should just try to fit in.


He arrives to a camp of about 10 men and a cou...

What would Miles Morales get called if he came to Europe?

Meters Morales

Funny how things are still tagged NSFW

As if any of us still have jobs

Update: stop bragging about being employed, it's lowering morale /s

If Peter Parker's webs are made out of spider silk ,then what is Miles Morales webs made out of ?

Cotton.

PS: I am black , so yeah , don't fill my inbox.

A Regimental Sergeant Major is inspecting his troops on the Parade ground at the end of a day's training....

.... as they line up in front of the CO, the RSM calls out.

"Before you are all dismissed I have an announcement. Private Jones. one step forward ... MARCH!!"

Private Jones steps forward from the first line of soldiers.

"Private Jones .... your Mother is dead. FALL IN!!"
...

War dress code

There is a war going on between the Germans and the Scottish and in the middle of the war two soldiers from opposite sides stop to talk and one of them asks the other โ€œwhy do you wear red uniforms?โ€ They respond โ€œwhen someone is shot the blood blends in and morale stays up. Why do you wear brown uni...

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

The Americans and The Japanese

The Americans and the Japanese decided to engage in a competitive boat race. Both teams practiced rowing hard and long to reach their peak performance. On the big day the Japanese won by a mile.

The American team was discouraged by the loss. Morale sagged. Corporate management decided that th...

What do you call a British spider man?

Kilometres Morales

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