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Hoops Jokes

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Tell me, what is it called when you're in your backyard naked shooting hoops?

Balls in your court.

A great name for a crematory would be AbraCadaver

Have you lost a loved one and don't know what to do next? AbraCadaver!

Tired of those pesky teenagers and their hula hoops on your lawn? AbraCadaver!

Interested in going out in a blaze of glory? AbraCadaver!

A Politician tries telling the truth for once

A crisis gripped the State.

"Mr. Politician! How do you intend to solve this crisis!"

"Honestly...? I don't know. This is a very complex situation, with so many moving parts that it's far beyond the understanding of any one person, or even a small group. I don't know what I'm going to ...

So there are these two rich old men who live next to each other...

At the on the border of their land is a pool that conjoins the two luxurious estates. In this pool each man has a pet dolphin. Every day, the two old men stand at the edge of the pool, and argue about who's dolphin is the smartest. This has gone in for years.

Then one day the first neighbor ...

New Game

Here's a new game we can all play!

You have to use a long mallet to hit frozen potato treats through hoops on a field. All while dressed as a frontiersman

I call it

Croquette Crockett Croquet

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

(A little long) There was a man who had just been booked into prison for the first time and was visibly nervous

A veteran inmate who has been there a while saw the newbie and went over and said “Hey, I can tell you’re new here and you’re nervous but prison is alright.”


The newbie responded “yeah?”


“Of course,” responded the vet. “Like for example do you like golfing?”


The new...

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My coworker is a goat herder

I had a meeting the other day at work and we were waiting for a few others to show up. I told him a few things I had been doing and he told me that him and his family are goat herders on the side from their actual jobs. Have been for generations.

The goats provide milk and meat, they can sel...

An acrobat and a contortionist are talking

The acrobat says to the contortionist, "Lately my boss has had me jumping through hoops to please customers". "I know how you feel" replies the contortionist. "I have to bend over backwards to get my job done"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Man Raises a Toast at the Bar

He toasts, "Here's to spending the rest of my life between my wife's legs!" The crowd hoops and hollers and declares that he won Toast of the Night.

Man goes home and says, "Honey! Honey! I won Toast of the Night!"

"That's great dear!" Says his wife. "What did you toast?"

"Here...

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