UPJOKE
henceforwardaccordinglythereforeherebythenceforthconsequentlydulystrictlythereuponforthwithaforesaidcannotbrazilobligedlawfully

Henceforth Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

[NSFW] I took a girl back to my place last night...

...as I was fucking her on my bed, I pulled out a bottle of lube and said, "Do you mind if I put it up your arse?"

She looked at me and said. "Is it going to hurt?"

I said, "Probably, it's a big bottle."


[EDIT]: My top post ever is about sadism! Damn I love Red...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

As a boy, I was made to believe that earwigs lived in ears

Henceforth, I was terrified of cockroaches

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A little know tale of the Legendary duo of King Akbar and his witty Minister Birbal.

So, King Akbar's daughter had reached the marriageable age. As was the custom at the time a competition was held to choose the right groom for her. The task was to pole vault over a 10 feet wall topped with barbed wire.

All eligible princes' were invited to the event, but no one was successfu...

If you didn't hear already, Meat Loaf died

Henceforth referred to as Ground Beef

Elon Musk has been captured by a fellow billionaire and is now trapped in a medieval rack.

He is to henceforth be known as Elon Gates.

How many lawyers does it take to change a lightbulb?

Such number as may be deemed necessary to perform the stated task in a timely and efficient manner within the strictures of the following agreement. Whereas the party of the first part, who will be henceforth be addressed as 'the lawyers' and the party of the second part, henceforth addressed as 'th...

The Washington Redskins finally decided to drop their offensive name.

Dan Snyder, owner of the NFL Redskins, has announced that the team is dropping "Washington" from the team name, and it will henceforth be simply known as, "The Redskins." It was reported that he finds the word "Washington" imparts a negative image of poor leadership, mismanagement, corruption, cheat...

The government have announced new measures to stop migrants from getting into England

Henceforth, Chelsea fans will be in charge of security at Calais.

Story with a moral

Young King Arthur was ambushed and imprisoned by the monarch of a neighboring kingdom. The monarch could have killed him but was moved by Arthur's youth and ideals. So, the monarch offered him his freedom, as long as he could answer a very difficult question. Arthur would have a year to figure out t...

[OC] Micheal Jordan's origin story.

Micheal Jordan loved basketball growing up. He was good at it too. Every day at school, he'd be playing basketball and everyone wanted him on thier team.

The only catch was that, he could only play B-Ball at school. There were no courts near his house. So... Micheal's father, whom I will hen...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.