UPJOKE
publicpubliclycommunityplebgeneralizepopulationsquadcommonmasspopulacecommunalgeneralsociologygeneralitygeneralship

General Public Jokes

How many Texas cops does it take to save children from an active shooter?

Still under investigation.







Edit: For those who assume I think any part of this situation is funny... [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Black\_comedy](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Black_comedy). Also who gave me a Wholesome award? That's seriously messed up.

Edit ...

Two Math Professors Are Sitting In A Pub. "Isn't It Disgusting", The First One Complains, "how Little The General Public Knows About Mathematics?

"Well", his colleague replies, "you're perhaps a bit too pessimistic."

"I don't think so", the first one replies. "And anyhow, I have to go to the bathroom."

He goes off, and the other professor decides to use this opportunity to play a prank on his colleague. He makes a sign to the ...

I’m opening a coffee shop and adult novelty store.

I can’t wait until the next Friday when ‘Ground and Flicked beans’ finally opens to the general public.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A train was famous for its late arrival.

There wasn't a single day when the train reached on time. So, the general public became accustomed to these situations..

One day, out of the blue, the train arrived the station at the exact scheduled time. The public went mad on seeing this and beat the crap out of the driver..

The dri...

During the communist rule

in the USSR a big assembly was held and members of the communist party were giving speeches to the general public. The highest ranking official was making his speech and he proclaimed "soon we will live even better!". This was followed by a voice from the audience "and what about us?!"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Medical Students

A group of first year medicals students are attending their first class. An eccentric looking lecturer walk in and says: "An important thing in medicine, is not to be fazed by what seems disgusting to the general public. Allow me to demonstrate" The lecturer brings a cadaver into the lecture theatre...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A few statistics...

Studies show ¾ths of the general public prefer to be told statistics in percents as compared to fractions.

10/9 of them are unable to spot errors in said statistics.

63% of the population will believe a statistic if it has a famous name cited with it. - Julius Cesar, May 1973

Th...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A gorilla that swung too far

A zoo was barely making ends meet. The head zookeeper was keeping things together, but it was a struggle. Instead of a pride of lions, they had one lone lion. Instead of a band of gorillas, just two. The rest of the zoo animals were just as sparse.

One day during a thunder and lightning storm...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The FBI and the Blonde

The year is 2001, and it's post-9/11. The United States is devastated for the tragic event that happened in their country and wants to increase their security. In result, the FBI agrees with recruiting agents in the general public.

A blonde hears about this and signs up for FBI. She enters th...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.