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Game Of Thrones Jokes

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I get anxious when I watch “Game of Thrones” with my parents, because of all the sex.

Sometimes I turn the volume up, so that I don’t hear them.

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Warning: Game of Thrones Spoilers

Will make your car look fucking stupid

What is the difference between Game of Thrones and Twitter?

With Twitter you only get 140 characters.
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How many Game of Thrones seasons does it take to change a lightbulb?

Eight, if you want to screw it completely.
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Game of thrones spoiler!!!!

Now that all the nerds aren't paying attention, party at my house this Saturday.

The ending of Game of Thrones makes sense, think about it.

Arya went west, Jon went north, Drogon went east, and the show went south.
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Whats the difference between Game of Thrones and a porno?

At the end of the porno everyone was satisfied

What does Senator Lindsey Graham, Upcoming Game of Thrones Book "Dream of Spring" and Video Game Star Citizen have in common?

None of them are ever coming out!





You're welcome
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What does The Walking Dead, Game of Thrones and Fast and Furious have in common?

All their Walkers are dead
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What's the difference between Game of Thrones and United Airlines?

One has dragons and the other has drag-offs
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Why doesn’t Napoleon watch Game of Thrones?

Because Winter is Coming
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Apparently, all the tents from the Game of Thrones sets are being redecorated for use in a new mini-series on Genghis Khan.

I am not sure why anyone is surprised about the recycled Khan tent.
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David Benioff and Dan Weiss wrote this joke for the loyal viewers of the Game of Thrones series

Season 8
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A different game of thrones

Long ago a then famous reporter of the times traveled to a little known kingdom deep in the heart of Africa, accompanied by translators and bearers of course. It was not very technologically advanced, with no plumbing and clay and stray being the primary building materials.

Upon arrival he w...
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What's the difference between the Game of Thrones books and a Chinese newspaper?

To understand everything in a Chinese newspaper you only need to know about 3,000 characters.
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Which Game of Thrones character doesn't stink ?

Bran

He is Hodorless
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Why do they run the credits at the beginning of Game of Thrones?

Because you don't know who is going to make it to the end.
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What do suicide and game of thrones have in common?

They both don’t end well.
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We've seen a lot of nudity on Game of Thrones

I think tonight might be the first night we have ever seen a Dickon fire though

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Why is game of thrones so popular?

Who doesn't enjoy a porn with good backstory?

Going on a one night stand with me is like Game of Thrones

Everything is exciting, conversations are awesome, you really like where things are going and you are excited for things to come.

Then you get home with me, and all the build up is ruined with sloppy action which ends way too soon with utter disappointment and you never want to think about it...
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What do beds and Game of Thrones have in common?

Put 2 twins together and you get a king.
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In Game of Thrones Winter Came...

And everyone left unsatisfied
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Three things happened when started watching Game of thrones.

1. My friend said he didn't like this series.
2. My friend got hit by bus.
3. I lost my bus license.
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Game of Thrones

Q: What's the name of Hodor's cat?

> A: Hodor

Q: Why did Hodor cross the road?

> A: Hodor

Q: How many Hodors does it take to screw in a lighbulb?

> A: Hodor

Q: What's the title of Hodor's favorite book?

> A: Hodor

Q: Why wasn'...
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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The final season of game of thrones is a lot like porn.

Awful dialogue, shallow plot, and the characters just keep getting fucked.

What did they name Game of Thrones' first stock exchange?

Investeros
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I watched all of Game of Thrones back to back with the girlfriend,

Fortunately I was the one facing the TV.
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What are the spiders like in Game of Thrones?

Varies.
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Game of Thrones Spoiler Joke

I heard the Night King just got a hold of one rarest YuGiOh cards
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People still having large weddings during a pandemic must be huge Game of Thrones fans.

After all a Dothraki wedding without at least 3 deaths is considered a dull affair.
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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Was in the bathroom the other day next to the guy that played Tyrion Lannister on Game of Thrones.

He wasn’t paying attention and pissed on my shoes. Damn that Peter Sprinklage.

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How can you tell if someone has never seen Game of Thrones?

They'll fucking tell you.

The guy who played "The Mountain" from Game of Thrones is 50% of a Norse god.

He's Hafthor.
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I feel sorry for Jorah in Game Of Thrones

He clearly loves Daenerys, but she just isn't one to savour the Mormont.
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People complain about Game of Thrones having a lot of incest...

...but Bran could have broken his arms instead of his legs
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Which Game of Thrones house does House Trump most resemble?

Definitely not House Lannister, because they always pay their debts.
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Game of Thrones is really getting out of hand...

Even websites are dying in the new season.
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An improved Game of Thrones joke

Robert Baratheon, Renly Baratheon and Stannis Baratheon go into a tavern. They order ale, but when the barkeep brings them over, they each find a fly in their cups. Robert goes into rage and smashes the cup, demanding new ale. Renly takes the fly out and laughs with the barkeep about it. Stannis rea...

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If I've learned anything from watching Game of Thrones..

It's that family always cums first.

I know who dies first in the last Game of Thrones...

The legacy of a once-great show
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[Game of Thrones S7 Spoiler] What do Dragons call Jon Snow?

Motherfucker.

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[Spoiler] In Game of Thrones, what is Jon and Dany's favorite sexual position?

Lannister style

Where do the Game of Thrones characters go to get their clothing pressed?

The Iron Islands.
...I'm so sorry, I've been re-watching the entire series in preparation for April and this stupid joke popped into my head after my Mum bought a new iron :3
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This season of Game of Thrones set new records for Piracy

Probably because it's written by George Arrrrr Arrrrr Martin
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A Game of Thrones Joke

What do Theon Greyjoy and Justin Timberlake have in common?
A dick in a box.

You know who's the best character in the Game of Thrones show right now?

It *Varys*
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[Game of Thrones] If you give Littlefinger two choices...

He'll always prefer the ladder
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I am glad Game of Thrones is coming to an end in 2019

I hate when TV shows dragon too long.
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People think that Ed Sheeran cameo in Game of Thrones was bad...

But I thought Amy Winehouse getting hit in the face with a rock in last nights episode was just in bad taste.
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What do the last ten minutes of Dexter and the last season of Game of Thrones have in common?

They ruin eight years of your life.
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Had an issue with how the latest season of Game of Thrones ended:

Bit of an auntie climax don't you think?
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Now that Game of Thrones is ending, you know who my dad thinks should write pirate books?

George "Arrre Arrre" Martin

I'm sorry.
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Why does Game of Thrones always kill off its main characters?

For the good of the watch.
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What was the most successful love story in Game of Thrones?

Shireen. She was only on Tinder for a couple of minutes.
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If Trump was cast in Game of Thrones, which character would he play?

Littlefingers
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What airline does Sophie Turner use when she's filming Game of Thrones?

Luftsansa
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Brexit must have impacted Game of Thrones' budget really badly… (spoilers)

I heard yesterday they fired half of the cast.
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If Daenerys from Game of Thrones married Khal Moro instead of Khal Drogo, guess what she would've named her biggest dragon?

Moron.
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LPT: Play the Game of Thrones theme tune before you have sex if there is a risk of being overheard.

Got me and my SO through the recent family stay overs during the festive season.

Kid from The Sixth Sense asked to comment on Game Of Thrones and he described it with one sentence.

"Icey dead people"
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What would Game of Thrones be called if it was about ice cream?

Game of Cones

If it was about sword sharpening: Game of Hones

If it was just everyone playing Go: Game of Stones

If everyone was single: Game of Alones

If it was about balls: Game of Throwns

If it was about spooky scary skeletons: Game of Bones

If everyone u...
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My boss asked me which Game of Thrones house he'd best be placed in...

I told him House Lannister because it only takes one hand to go fuck yourself.

I told my friend a joke about last night's Game of Thrones episode..

He agreed it was well done.
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How do you know there are no Asians leading the White Walker armies in Game of Thrones?

Because two Wongs don't make a wight.
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My friend still hasn’t seen season 8 of Game of Thrones. And every time I try to broach the subject she just yells at me, “No Spoilers!” So I gave up on trying to warn her

That she shouldn’t name her baby, Khaleesi.
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Anybody know where I can get a Game of Thrones Valentine's day card?

It's for my sister.
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What did Kanye West say when he saw the Red Wedding episode of Game of Thrones?

Dat shit Frey.

I heard that there is going to be a Game of Thrones crossover with Westworld. (Spoilers for both shows)

Hodor: Hodor!!!

Bernard: What door?
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[Game of Thrones Spoiler ALL BOOKS Fan Theory] Benjen, Bran, Daario, Euron, Syrio, Jaqen, and Coldhands walk into a restaurant..

and say: "Table for one, please."
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A man suddenly appeared at the gates of Hell… (Story Joke)

He looked up to see the Devil sitting at a chair.

“Hello my friend,” The Devil said kindly, “How are you this fine eternity?”

“A bit confused,” the man replied, “I didn’t realise that I was dead.”

“I understand,” the Devil said sympathetically, “Why don’t you tell me how you go...
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2020 is starting to feel like...

The game of thrones series finale we deserve
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If you spell Breaking Bad backwards, you will get "Dab Gnikaerb"

Which still makes more sense than Game of thrones\` entire season 8
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Donald Trump is walking along a beach

He stumbles over an old bottle, he picks it up and pulls the cork.
With a flash of light and a puff of smoke a Genie appears before him.

"Thank you Donald for releasing me from my prison, I shall grant you any 1 wish"

Trump immediately blurts out "I want a Dragon like from game of t...
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If a round of musical chairs were played using toilet bowls instead of chairs...

would it be Game of Thrones?
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My friend recently subscribed to HBO and asked me if I could help him with the name of the disaster TV show he had been hearing everyone talk about at work.

Apparently, it's not Game of Thrones S8.
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