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Gait Jokes

Scientists studied the gait of inebriated men.

The results were staggering.

I tried to join this walking group, but was rejected because they said I didn't walk "the right way."

Man, I hate gait-keepers.

What kind of neighborhood was Monty Python’s Ministry of Silly Walks located in?

A gaited community.

Why did saint peter call a podiatrist?

Because something was wrong with heavens gait

A female crab sees a male crab walking in a straight line

Amazed by the crab's rare gait, she is smitten.

She asks him to marry her, and he happily agrees.

The next day, she notices that he is walking normally in a zigzag pattern.

She is shocked. She asks him why he is walking in this manner now.

He replies, "Baby, I can't be th...

When god gave out bodies, he did it in alphabetical order.

GOD: And to you, horse, I give you a golden mane, great strength and speed, and a giant gait. You will be the noblest of beasts, and men will love you.

HORSEFLY (next in line): Oh man this is gonna be gooood

After seducing a woman, a man goes home with a confident stride. But what if he had seduced a man instead?

Then he would go home with a confident gait.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Old Sven collapsed one chill November Saturday after chopping maple wood near his house in the birch forest, five miles outside of Eagle River, Wisconsin.

He arose, sauntered home and changed into his flannel, tractor-print pajamas. It grew quiet and his breathing became labored. So, Sven lay down on the plaid-quilted single bed in the green guest room. His wife, Lena, tended to his care. He said nothing and sipped only a cup of water or two. On the e...

Jesus was set in charge of pearly gates of St. Peter for a few minutes.

One day Jesus was walking by the pearly gates when St Peter asked him to watch the gates for a few minutes.

Jesus agrees and in a few minutes he sees an old old man approach.

The old man walked very slowly, had a halting gait, long white hair and a beard. When Jesus asked if he could ...

I decided to go out horse riding one afternoon on a horse I hadn’t rode before....

I wasn’t sure if the horse was ready for a rider just yet, so I slowly approached him, all the while talking gentle to the horse like I have always done when dealing with newer horses. I kept saying “easy boy” and I slowly reached out to pet him. The horse nervously kept its eyes on me, but he final...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

You're going to need more of that confidence now.

A rich CEO flies his private jet across the country to get an appointment with the best gynecologist in the business.

"Doctor," he says, "I'm not happy with the state of my sex life, and I want to you to castrate me today."

The doctor is shocked and asks, "Oh my... Okay, have you thoug...

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