Empty Space Jokes - 12 Hilarious Empty Space Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Me: "i'm terrified of those big empty spaces people yell into."

Therapist: "A void."

Me: "Good advice, thank you."

Have you heard about the man with an irrational fear of empty spaces?

Nothing scares him

An Irishman is struggling to find a parking space

“Lord”, he prays, ”I cannot stand this, please open a parking space for me and I swear I’ll give up the drink and go to mass every Sunday.”

The clouds part and the sun shines on an empty space in the car park. Without hesitation the Irishman says, “Actually never mind, I’ve found one.”

Biology tell me you're 70% water. Physics tells me that you're 99.99% empty space. Chemistry tells me that you're 60% oxygen.

But I'm telling you that you're a 100% CUTIE!!!

After drifting through empty space for almost 50 years, what is Pioneer 9's favorite cheese?

*probe-alone*

There was this astronomer.

He browsed r/jokes everyday and after a while he realised that the same jokes were posted over and over again.

He decided to start posting one joke a day, after his morning astronomy sessions.

His jokes were always well received and every so often one of his jokes would reach the fro...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A tired American solider

An American solider serving in WWII had just returned from intense action on the German front lines. He had finally been granted the R&R and was on a train bound London. The train was very crowded, so the solider walked the length of the train looking for an empty seat.

The only unoccupi...

A man was looking for a space to park his car in the parking lot of a mall...

After a lot of effort of going round and round he couldn't find an empty space so he started praying, please God help me find a parking space, I will go to church everyday for the rest of my life and would even give half of my life savings to charity..

Suddenly he sees a car pulling out of a ...

Jokes Bus

A man boards a bus, to his surprise it is full of r/jokes users. He finds an empty space and settles in.

He quickly finds out a pattern to the ongoing conversations. One person stands up and shouts a number - Two hundred and sixty one!! Everyone starts laughing. Another person stands up as th...

What do a bag of Lay's potato chips and the Milky Way have in common?

They're both mostly empty space.

Small talk

The year is 2097. In the midst of a nuclear war, two babies are sent from Earth in a pod to an empty SpaceX bunker on Mars in the hopes they will survive and continue the human race.

After years in isolation and with packaged food becoming scarce, the young humans decided to venture out onto ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

TWO GLASSES OF WINE

When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hours in
a day are not enough, reme mber the mayonnaise jar and the 2 glasses of wine...

A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front
of him. When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.