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An extremely attractive young blond woman goes to a massage parlor.

She explains that this will be her first massage, and she really has no idea what to expect. The masseur tells her she'll need to disrobe and lie on the table. The young woman blushes, but strips off all of her clothes, struts across the room, and lies on the massage table.

The masseur can't...

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The farting Baron

A nervous young man arrives for the first time at the house of his new girlfriend, and is greeted at the door by her father and Baron, the family dog. The young man is invited to sit in the living room to visit with the dad while his date is getting ready upstairs, and Baron wags his tail and sits c...

The guardsman, the commissar, and the orks.

Preface: In case you are not familiar with the Warhammer universe, if enough orks believe something, reality will warp to make it so. And no... I am not the author of the joke... Do get over it please.



Once upon a time, there was a fierce battle raging in the jungle between the Imperi...

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The only good joke I know, and it's about blind people

Two guys are walking their dogs and come across a bar. One of them smiles. "shit yeah, let's get wasted!" he says. The other guy isn't sure. "I dunno, man. I don't want to leave my dog outside around these parts." "Dude, relax. Just follow my lead."

The first guy puts on some sunglasses, then...

Seems there was a treasure ship on its way back to port.

About halfway there, it was approached by a pirate, skull and crossbones waving
in the breeze!

"Captain, captain, what do we do?" asked the first mate.

"First mate," said the captain, "go to my cabin, open my sea
chest, and bring me my red shirt." The first mate did so.
...

Happy Easter Weekend ...

It is the day of Christ's crucifixion, and Jesus is being nailed in as his followers gather at the base of Golgotha to weep and mourn.

As they pray, they hear Jesus call out in a soft voice: "Peter ... Peter ..."

"Our Lord calls to you, Peter!" Thomas says.

Emboldened, Peter t...

A lady with a mildly upset tummy gets on a street car for a cross town appointment...

When approaching the first stop, she notices the street car’s brakes make a horribly loud racket. Given the state of her upset tummy she decides that she can take advantage of the street car’s worn brakes. Cautiously, upon approaching the next stop she perfectly times the release of a small amount...

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A man out golfing meets a leprechaun [Long]

One Saturday afternoon in Ireland, a man is playing a round of golf on his local public course. As he approaches the eighth hole, he hits the ball and slices it pretty hard to the right. Grumbling, he walks out, deep past the weeds and into the tall grass of the surrounding forest, where he stumbles...

I got slapped at the club the other day

I went dancing at a local club, hoping to get a little action since it's been a while. I met this gorgeous girl and asked her to dance, a little emboldened by the alcohol. After the first song with her body so close to mine, she leans in and says "You smell good! Whatcha got on?"

I said, "Wel...

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A man named Tony gets on an airplane

A man named Tony gets on an airplane in New York going to Las Vegas, and takes his seat. As he settles in, he glances up and sees a stunningly beautiful and very sexy woman boarding the plane. He soon realizes she is heading straight towards him. A wave of nervous anticipation washes over him. Lo an...

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