Driving Test Jokes

I replied 'Probably failing my driving test'.

The instructor describes a situation: "You're driving along and suddenly there are two people in front of you. A bit to the left there's an old hag and a bit to the right there's a beautiful young woman. Your car can't make it between them. What do you do?"



The young man says: "Well I... read more

I accidentally reversed into a school playground.

I passed with flying colors!

2 guys jumped out to safety.

there is an old man and a little baby, what do you hit?





the brakes.

He made a few Wookiee errors.

He left his foot on the clutch.

Officer: You are driving a car down the road, you see your husband and your brother crossing the road from opposite lanes.

What will you hit first?

Woman: Husband! My husband!

Officer: This is the third time I'm telling you madam, you hit the brakes first!

He's an excellent parallel Parker.

The instructor asks him: What road sign is that?

The gypsy replies: Aluminium

My girlfriend had just passed her driving test so she drove me to town.

It was packed but we managed to find a space but she was nervous about doing a parallel park.

"I'm confident in you babe just do what you did in the test" I said

She slowly started unziping my flies.

"Probably failing my driving test," I replied.

I said they couldn't fail you for that, he said they can when it's in the butcher's window.

... and asked his father as to when they could discuss his use of the car.

His father said he'd make a deal with his son, "You bring your grades up from a C to a B average, study your Bible a little and get your hair cut. Then we'll talk about the car" The boy thought about that for a moment,... read more

...she Tweeted three times that it seem to be going well.

He probably would have survived if he was in a car.

He kept hitting cones.

Halfway through the test, we passed a primary school and unfortunately someone walked out into the road, it took me completely by surprise. I was really upset that I'd failed my test, until the examiner assumed me that it was fine, it was only a minor.

She took a driving test, when the examiner said drive through, she responded with, I'll take 5 big macs, 20 mcnuggets, and a large coke.

I said, "probably failing my driving test."

Two truck driving brothers are taking a driving test, and the instructor asks, "You're driving the truck and you're at the top of a mountain and your brakes go out. You notice an accident at the bottom of the mountain, what do you do?"
The trucker replies, "The first thing I do is wake up my bro... read more