There were these two kids who ran away from their home in Why, Arizona. One was a tall, white kid. The other was a short, Asian kid. After running away from home, a police officer notices them. They were caught milking baby gila monsters for their venom. The cop didn't want to send them to juvi...
Abbott & Costello
COSTELLO: I want to talk about the unemployment rate in America .
ABBOTT: Good Subject. Terrible Times. It's 7.8%.
COSTELLO: That many people are out of work?
ABBOTT: No, that's 14.7%
COSTELLO: You just said 7.8%.
ABBOTT: 7.8% Unemployed.
COSTELLO: Righ...
Abbot & Costello
You have to be old enough to remember Abbott and Costello, and too old to REALLY understand computers, to fully appreciate this. For those of us who sometimes get flustered by our computers, please read on...
If Bud Abbott and Lou Costello were alive today, their infamous sketch,<...
Abbot and Costello meet the Corona Virus
The World Health Organization says Corona is officially a pandemic.
Who says that?
Yes.Â
Who said it's a pandemic?
That's right! They also said don't touch anyone.
Who?Â
Anyone!Â
I'm asking, WHO said don't touch anyone?Â
Absolutely. And...
Abbott and Costello
Costello: . . . I was in love with a bow-legged cowgirl and she was roundin' up cattle. Abbott: And what happened? Costello: She couldn't get her calves together. ~ Rio Rita (1942)
Just remembered my favorite Abbott and Costello joke
Costello: Bud, you should make sure to marry a homely girl.
Abbott: Why's that?
Costello: Well, a pretty girl is liable to run away.
Abbott: Isn't a homely girl liable to run away, too?
Costello: Yeah, but who cares!
Lou Costello : Well that’€™s gonna cost you overtime because I’€™m a union man and I work only sixteen hours a day.
McDougal : A union man only works eight hours a day.
Lou Costello : I belong to two unions.
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