Kellyanne Conway did not test positive for Covid-19

She tested alternative-negative

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man who looks exactly like Conway Twitty has car trouble and goes looking to use a phone...

He gets to a neighborhood, knocks on the first door he comes to. A woman answers the door.

"Oh my God, you're Conway Twitty!" She shouts.

"No ma'am, I hear that all the time, but I'm not him, my car broke down, may I use your phone?"

"Well if you're not him, you're not using my ...

COVID-19 didn't kill John Conway. It was the social distancing.

He had fewer than 2 neighbors.

[Credit to "Darren New" on YouTube for this one. Also, if you find this funny, you're an awful person.]

An English man is making a map of Wales

He goes in to the first place he comes across. Walks in to the biggest building and asks the first person he can find, what's this place called? Cardiff the person says. The English man marks Cardiff on his map and carrys on. After a while he spots another settlement so again he walks in to the bigg...

What Does Kellyanne Conway Call Her Computer's Scanner?

Alternative Fax.

I asked Kellyanne Conway for her email

And she said "oh you mean my alternative fax?"

Trump was cleaning his gun in Trump Tower...

Kellyanne Conway walks in and asks,

Kellyanne: "Why do you have a gun?"

Trump: "Obama Spy Drones"

Kellyanne: \*laughs\*

Trump: \*laughs\*

Microwave: \*laughs\*

Trump shoots the Microwave.

Trump got angry with computers again...

Trump got angry with computers again, and ordered that White House staff are no longer allowed to use email to communicate.

Conway calmed him down and came up with a work-around. White House staff can continue using email, but in order not to anger Trump, they have to call it by a different n...

New Alabama Preacher

The new Alabama preacher was a dead ringer for Conway Twitty. One day he decided to visit some of the church members who hadn't been to service lately. He went to the first lady's house and knocked on the door. When she answered the door, she said, "Conway Twitty!"

No, ma'am," he replied. "I...

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