I always use chloroform when stealing a child.

Really puts the "nap" in "kidnap".

An anesthesiologist asks his colleague, "Man I borrow some chloroform?"

"Knock yourself out."

The Scots invented hypnosis, chloroform and the hypodermic syringe.

Wouldn't it just be easier to talk to a woman?

Does this joke smell like chloroform to you?

Well it kinda do-

It takes up to 5 minutes for Chloroform to work

And it takes additional applications for the desired outcome.

......talk about an awkward evening

What do you get when you chloroform a petting zoo?

The Silence of the Lambs

A man and a women are on a blinddate

Suddenly the man says: „ You know, I have experienced that humor is the second best method to get someone in bed“
Puzzled she asks him: „ Then what is the best?“
He answers: „ Chloroform“
She chuckles: „You certainly have humor“
He mutters:„Good choice“

If you're going to drink and drive, always carry a flask in your car

If you get pulled over for a DUI, put the flask in your lap, suspiciously​ insist that it's "water," and that's when the officer finds out that's it's chloroform.

I asked my secret crush if she wanted to invest in my new invention idea, chloroform kleenex.

She decided to sleep on it...at my place.

How to get out of friendzone

"Hey does this rag smell like chloroform to you?" Works everytime

What is the most calming scent?

Chloroform

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I have this thing for girls with big butts

Chloroform.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Yeah sex is great and all that...

But chloroform gets expensive after a week or two

What’s the most effective chat up line in the world?

Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

How do you make any girl fall for you?

Chloroform

LPT: If you've got toddlers at home, and you're going to take them out...

You can probably get away with using a light sedative. Save chloroform for children 12 and older.

Ruin a date in 5 words...

Does this smell like chloroform?

What cologne does Bill Cosby wear?

Chloroform

She fell for me head over heels

Good thing I brought the chloroform

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Apparantly i have never given a girl an orgasm.. :(

Could it be that i use too much chloroform?

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Girlfriend caught me having sex last night

I'm surprised she woke up, next time I'll use more chloroform.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Theme 3: 1 Liners, Words of Wisdom

*I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

*Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.

*Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in ...

I was walking behind a girl late at night

I open silently the bottle of chloroform so she doesn't freak out.
I put out my tissue,
put chloroform on it,
*sneezing*
clean my nose,
and pass out

I'm not a smart man

I've gotten 100000+ girls in bed with this line.

Does my handkerchief smell like chloroform?

Why did I need to bring a shovel on my first date?

Clearly the chloroform wasn't enough.

What's colorless and smells sweet?

Chloroform

SHHHH..

Welcome to organic chemistry

Where questions like 'where do you keep your chloroform?', are no longer suspicious.

A girl who I've been seeing goes to sleep early.

But that's mostly from the chloroform.

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.