Why did Alexander Fleming had to invent the penicillin?
Because Alexander was phlegming!
(Eh. I. tried.)
What do you get the man who has everything?
So an American walks into a store in the Midwest and says, I'd like to buy that .50 cal sniper riffle with 4,000 rounds of ammunition and a box of penicillin...
The store clerk replies: sorry Sir, I'm going to have to see some paperwork for that penicillin.
A psycopath goes into a store
He approaches the person at the counter and asks:
-Hello sir, may I have an assault rifle, 3,000 rounds, a scope, and a box of penicillin?
-Sorry sir, I can't sell you penicillin without a prescription.
I was making fancy French cheese...
I tried to make the rind but it didn't work. Turns out I had used penicillin instead of *Penicillium*...
Just another example of food ruined by antibrieotics...
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
Dear Mother and Dad: It has now been three months since I left for college.
Dear Mother and Dad: It has now been three months since I left for college. I have been remiss in writing this and I am very sorry for my thoughtlessness in not having written before. I will bring you up to date now, but before you read on, please sit down. YOU ARE NOT TO READ ANY FURTHER UNLESS YOU...