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Penicillin Jokes

Have you heard about the rising political tensions between yogurt and penicillin? One side is probiotic, and the other is antibiotic.

They're calling it a culture war.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Once, in the fifteenth Century B.C., there lived a pharaoh.

And that pharaoh once got a sexually transmitted disease.

All the best medics of Egypt tried to cure him, but all have failed. Until one day, an old man told him that in one oasis to the west, there is an old sect of priests who know many secrets of medicine.

Quickly, the pharaoh order...

Why did Alexander Fleming had to invent the penicillin?

Because Alexander was phlegming!

(Eh. I. tried.)

What should you give a woman who has everything?

Penicillin

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

News from School

Dear Mom and Dad,

It has been three months now since I left for college. I have been remiss in writing and I am very sorry for my thoughtlessness in not writing before. I will bring you up to date now, but before you read on, please sit down. You are not to read further unless you are s...

So an American walks into a store in the Midwest and says, I'd like to buy that .50 cal sniper riffle with 4,000 rounds of ammunition and a box of penicillin...

The store clerk replies: sorry Sir, I'm going to have to see some paperwork for that penicillin.

What do you get a man who has everything?

Penicillin.


Source: my 90 year-old grandpa, this Christmas morning

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An angry man walked into a Taverna one evening, and yelled "I hate the Greeks!"

He looked around, at the light blue wall paper, with the white Grecian key pattern going around the top. He stared into the eyes of the bar tender, a strapping young lad with an olive complexion, rich black hair, a glorious unibrow, and piercing green eyes.

"Are you a Greek?" he asked, menaci...

A psycopath goes into a store

He approaches the person at the counter and asks:

-Hello sir, may I have an assault rifle, 3,000 rounds, a scope, and a box of penicillin?

-Sorry sir, I can't sell you penicillin without a prescription.

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