I got banned from /r/Jokes for posting, "Frosted Flakes! Cheerios! Lucky Charms! Frosted Flakes! Cheerios! Lucky Charms! Frosted Flakes! Cheerios! Lucky Charms! Frosted Flakes! Cheerios! Lucky Charms! Frosted Flakes! Cheerios! Lucky Charms! Frosted Flakes! Cheerios! Lucky Charms!"

Mods said I'm a cereal reposter...

Male bees die after mating. That's basically their entire lives.

Honey. Nut. Cheerio.

My brother just ran into the kitchen and stepped on all our Cheerios!

He’s a cereal killer

So, as everyone knows, two different species (flavors) of cheerios cannot mate, right?

That is, if one is honey-nut and another is blueberry, they cannot mate. Anyway, there is this one normal cheerio that is in love with a blueberry cheerio. Unfortunately, he cannot mate with her. He can't even communicate with her because they are of different species. So, he invents a machine that ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Once upon a time there was a Cheerio.

(long)

This Cheerio dreamed of going to Perfect Cheerio Land, where only the best Cheerios lived. In Perfect Cheerio Land, there was everything a little Cheerio’s heart desired.

One day, when Cheerio woke up, an angel cheerio was at the foot of his bed. The angel said, “I am here to ta...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call someone who dips their dick in a bowl of Cheerios?

A cereal rapist

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two brothers are in their room one morning. The older brother says, "Billy, I'm 9 and you're 6. We're practically men. So today when we go downstairs for breakfast, I'm gonna say hell and you're gonna say ass."

illy nods his head in excitement and they go downstairs. The boys sit at the table and their mom greets them.

"Good morning boys, what would ya'll like for breakfast?"

Billy looks at his older brother, who smiles and throws his arm over the back rest and says, "Ah hell mom, make it che...

I heard about a man who used poisoned Cheerios to murder people

He was quite the cereal killer

What do you call Cheerios that messed around behind their boyfriend's back?

Cheatos

For April fools my girlfriend replaced my alphabits with Cheerios.

I have no words to say how angry I am.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A group of friends was walking around the red light district and came across a sign that said “donuts.”

Hank turned to the other two, Joey and Carl, and said, “Guys, I heard about this! The girl puts a donut on your junk and then goes to town. It’s supposed to be the best thing you can do here. We should do it. It’s not like we’re going to get this chance again!”

Reluctantly, the other two agr...

The cheerio wanted to go to prom with a honey nut cheerio

A plain Cheerio wanted his prom date to be a beautiful Honey Nut Cheerio, the Cheerio asks the Honey Nut Cheerio to the dance, the Honey Nut Cheerio rejects and says "I only date Honey Nut Cheerios". A farmer approaches the now saddened Cheerio and tells him "Do some work on my farm and I'll turn yo...

So there's this cheerio who works at Burger King...

And he's a fantastic employee. He constantly washes tables and takes orders without complaints.

Every month, the Burger King Corporation throws a cheerio employee of the month party. It's always been Honey Nut's dream to go, but Fruity always gets to go. Every. Damn. Month. But not this mont...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two guys at the airport each with black eyes

Notice each other.
First Guy: Hey, how did you get that black eye?

Second Guy: Funny story, I meant to ask the woman at the counter for 2 tickets to Pittsburgh, but a slip of the tongue and I said 2 pickets to tittsburgh and she socked me one! How about you?

First Guy: Same thing, ...

What did fruit loops say when launching their product to compete with cheerios?

Toucan play at that game

What's the difference between patriots, eagles, and Cheerios?

Cheerios belong in a Bowl.

Did you guys hear about that girl they found murdered in Colorado? They found her covered in milk with cheerios still in her mouth.

They think it was a cereal killer....

So there's a box of cheerios...

Inside the box of cereal, it's like a cereal city, and there are three layers:

1. The top layer - this is the best place for the cheerios to live. All the best houses, the best cars, the best restaurants, etc, are in this part of the box. The ritziest cheerios live here, and everything is ex...

The Cheerio Joke

Oh boy do I have a joke for you...
Its called the cheerio joke.

\-------------------------------------

So there is this land called cheerio land and in cheerio land there are 7 classes of cheerio, 0-5 and the frosted cheerios. Now there is this level 0 cheerio. Hes hom...

A cheerio walks into his boss's office...

And he says to his boss, “Boss, I want to be more delicious than a plain old Cheerio.” The boss shuffles his papers around a bit, and replies. “Okay, I tell you what. If you go out and work for a year, I’ll upgrade you to a Honey Nut Cheerio.” The Cheerio thinks on it, and quickly agrees. He goes ou...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

In the land of Cheerios...

In the land of Cheerios there is a cast system. At the top there are the king and queen Cheerios, next come the noble Cheerios, then the night Cheerios who are responsible for law enforcement in the land, then come the peasant Cheerios who are somewhat oppressed but work hard and get by, and then th...

The Tale of Two Cheerios

One day, a lone cheerio goes to a party and finds a pretty female cheerio. He says to her "Hey there, beautiful. Would you like to go out with me?" The female cheerio says "Sorry, but I only date frosted cheerios." The male cheerio then goes home and looks to see how much money he has to get himself...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Mr. Cheerio, the Fruity Cheerio (long, but it's worth it)

Once upon a time, there was a Fruity Cheerio. He was a poor cheerio, and lived on the streets. He had no family, and begged other cheerios for money every day. One day, Mr. Cheerio decided to pray to the Cheerio God.

"Dear Cheerio God. I am your humble Cheerio servant. I kindly ask that you ...

So in Cheerio Land there are 4 levels to the social hierarchy.

At the bottom you've got plain cheerios, these are your basic working class folks.

Above them are the honey nut cheerios, more of the middle-management level cheerios.

After them are the fruity cheerios, you know, the real artsy, middle-class types.

At the top are the frosted ch...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Fucking Cheerios

A young couple was having a hard time reining in their twin eight year old boys' swearing. At home, in school, in public, with company, on the phone; every other sentence was "fuck this" or "fuck that".

Late one night, after the twins were in bed, mom and dad began plotting how to control the...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Did you hear about the guy who kept fucking cheerios?

He was a cereal rapist

There once was a cheerio...

There once was a cheerio who lived on plain cheerio island. He lived his life working 16 hours, 7 days a week, trying just to make ends meet. But all of this was pointless; he was not going anywhere in life. He would never end up with the prosperous cheerios on Frosted Cheerio island - or so he thou...

A Day in the Life of a Cheerio

One day in Cheerio City, an ordinary young Cheerio started his day. He decided to get a job. He was nearing his sell by date and figured it was time. There are three social classes in Cheerio City: the Regulars, the Wheats, and the Frosteds. The young Cheerio was simply a Regular and had little to n...

There are 4 levels of cheerios in this world.

The levels are, from bottom to top, regular, chocolate, honey nut, and the highest level is the status of Froot Loops. Jim is a regular old cheerio, and is unhappy with his life. So he studies for weeks and weeks, takes the test, and becomes a chocolate cheerio. He parties for a while, makes lots of...

What did the blonde say when she looked into the box of Cheerios?

Wow!! Donut seeds!!!!

What is Gepetto's favorite cereal?

I know you think it's Pinnochi-o's, but it's actually Cheerios. They're whittle o's. Though I guess both woodwork.

When I was younger, I thought I was clever by coming up with a joke: What is a British person's favourite cereal?

Cheerios!

I told this to joke to a British person.

They were a little tea'd off.

A joke I heard a while ago

So there’s this Cheerio. In cheerio-land, there are three kinds of people: original, blueberry, and honey nut. He desperately wants to be honey nut. So he goes to the tattoo shop, and the cheerio running it says he can become a blueberry cheerio first, but it’s gonna cost some money.

He star...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two boys, 8 and 10 constantly swear...

One evening, when the boys are fighting, the mother gets fed up and decides she is done.

She tells the boys " I've had enough of your potty mouths! The next time I hear you cuss, I'm going to slap you!! Now get to your rooms!!!"

The next morning she is in the kitchen when the boys co...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two brothers are in their room at night formulating a plan.

"I think we're old enough to start cussing," the older brother says. "Tomorrow morning, I'm going to say 'hell' and you're going to say 'ass', ok?" His younger brother agrees to the plan.

The boys go downstairs in the morning and their mom asks them what they would like for breakfast.
...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A five year old and a four year old decide to start cursing

A five year old and a four year old are upstairs in their bedroom. "You know what?" says the five year old, "I think it's about time we start swearing." The four year old nods his head in approval. The 5 year old continues, "When we go down stairs for breakfast I'm gonna say "hell", and you say "ass...

Told this joke every summer as a camp counselor; never failed

This cheerio works 9-5 at a factory doing the same mundane task every day of every year. One day, this smoking hot frosted cheerio walks in and the normal cheerio falls for her instantly. He walks up to her and says:

“Hey, want to grab something to eat later?” And she says:

“Actually,...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two young brothers decide its time they start cussing....

Two young brothers decide its time they start cussing. So one night the elder makes a plan, "this morning at breakfast, I'll say damn and you say fuck" the younger agrees and they go to bed eager for the next morning.

Breakfast time comes and their mother ask what they'd like to eat. The olde...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

One morning two brothers, 4 and 6, decide they are old enough to start cursing...

The younger asks his brother, "What should we say?"

"You say ass, and I'll say hell," replies the elder of the two.

Walking down stairs their mother asks them what they would like for breakfast.

"Oh hell," replies the elder, "I'll have some Cheerios."

Their mother loses ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two business men are flying first class on an airplane...

They are both wearing suits, carrying briefcases, and both of them have a black eye.

Wondering what the odds of their circumstances are, they start up a conversation

Man #1: “Hey buddy, kinda funny that we’re both dressed for business, flying first class, and we both have black eyes. ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

There was a 6 year old and a 4 year old brother. It was the 6 year olds birthday that day. They wake up in the morning and...

The 6 year old says to his younger brother “Hey, I think today is the day we start using swear words around Mom. After all I’m 6 now.”

The younger brother starts getting excited and says, “Ok! What swear words should we use?!”

The older brother replies with, “I’m going to say hell, and...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Bob Takes a Seat

Bob takes a seat on a train. He looks up and notices the man in front of him also has a black eye. So Bob asks the man “Hey, how’d you get yours?”

The man says “I walked up to the ticket booth to buy two tickets to Pittsburg. When I got to the booth the lady selling the tickets had huge bo...

Cerealsly amazing joke

Once upon a time, there was a Cheerio who wanted something to do with his life, because it sucked. He decided he wanted to marry someone. So, one day, he went to the town square and saw a beautiful Fruit Loop. He went up to her and tried to ask her out on a date, but before he could get any words ou...

Two Young Children Walk Down The Stairs

The 9 year old says to the 7 year old
“I think that we’re old enough to start swearing now.”

The 7 year old says
“Okay but when will we do it”

The 9 year old just says
“Follow my lead.”

They walk into the kitchen and their mother says
“What would you like for bre...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you want for breakfast?

3 young boys come down to breakfast in the morning.

Their mom, looking a bit put out, looks at the oldest boy and says, "What'll you have for breakfast?"

The boy replies, "Aw hell mom, I'll have some Cheerios"

The mom whacks him 3 times on the head and yells, "go to your room!"<...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A mother asked her two son what they would like for breakfast

The first brother says I would like some damn Cheerios

The mother absolutely horrified slapped her son and said never do that again.

The mother then ask the second brother what he would like for breakfast

He said I sure as fuck don’t want Cheerios

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two guys sit down on a train...

Two men sit down on a train, in the same cabin, and begin reading the newspaper.

When they look up, they make eye contact, and both realize, they each had a black eye.

Both men start to chuckle, and decided to exchange stories

Guy1: "...Yeah, I really got it."

Guy2: "Me ...

What breakfast cereal do they serve at the Swiss clinic, Dignitas?

Cheerios!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A single mother asked her dad what she should do because her young sons were starting to curse like sailors...

He told her the next time one of them said a bad word to smack him in the mouth and send him to his room.

The next morning at breakfast the boys came into the kitchen and the mother asked them what they would like for breakfast...

The oldest son replied... I want some fucking Cheerios...

My wife said that she’s leaving me because of my obsession with breakfast cereals.

I said, “Ok. Cheerios then.”

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

2 brothers, 12 and 10 decide it's time for them to act more manly

It's just before breakfast and the 2 brothers in their bedroom upstairs decide they're going to start cursing since that's what they see in the adult shows and movies. Mom calls them down for breakfast and they head down to the kitchen and take a seat. Mom turns to the 10 year old and asks "what wou...

Apparenty we have a serial killer in our family.

All my Honey Nut Cheerios are gone.

What does cereal say when it leaves the room?

Cheerio

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two lads are learning to cuss

Two brothers are learning to cuss and they decide they need practice. Their conversation goes something like this...

Older bro: tomorrow when we go downstairs for breakfast I’m gonna say “hell” and you’re gonna say “ass”

Younger bro: alrighty!

The next day when the boys go downs...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What did the serial rapist say on his way out the door?

Cheerio

Two kids are headed down to the breakfast table...

...when one says to the other:
"Let's pretend we're adults and swear like grown-ups."

They hurry down to the breakfast table where they're greeted by their mother.

"Do you want some Cheerios for breakfast?" she asks one of the boys.

"No I don't want any damn Cheerios!"...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two brothers, ages four and six, are sitting in their front yard...

The six year old says to his little brother, “hey, tomorrow morning at breakfast... let’s say swear words to mom.” The four year old likes the idea and replies, “yeahhhhhh I like that!”

So the next day at breakfast, mom comes out to the kitchen and asks the boys what they would like for break...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Learning new curse words

Little Sally and Jonnie were getting ready for bed one night when Jonnie asked Sally, “hey, did you learn any new curse words today?” Sally replies, “yes, I sure did! Ass!”

Jonnie says “oh that’s so cool! I learned a new one too... Damn!”

“That’s so cool!” Says Sally. Let’s use them...

Classic Family Guy Joke

Peter: Brian, Look! There is a message in my Alphabet Cereal. it says, "oooooo"

Brian: Peter! You are eating Cheerios.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two little kids decide to cuss like Dad

Two boys were in their bedroom before school one morning, the oldest boy looks at the younger one and says "hey let's start cussing today like Dad does." Little brother says alright yeah! The older brother said I'll find a way to say hell and you find a way to say ass. The little brother then agreed...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Joe is sitting in the break room at work looking depressed [Long]

When one of his friends sits down and asks him “Hey, Joe. Are you alright? You haven’t been yourself lately.”

Joe looks up “Oh hey Frank. Nah haven’t been feeling good at all. Things at home aren’t that great, my sex life is in the bin, my wife and I have lost our fire.”

Frank says “He...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Learning to Swear

Two brothers, 7 and 5, decide one evening that they are getting older, and it's time they learned to swear. The older brother says that he will work on "Damn" and the younger brother agrees to refine his usage of "Ass".

The next morning, the brothers come down the stairs and their mother asks...

You wanna know the best food to eat when sad?

Cheerios

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two young brothers were up in their room...

They were three and five years old, and had just decided that they wanted to say a swear word for the first time that morning.  The older brother hatched out a plan, "When we walk downstairs, I'll say the word 'hell' in a sentence, and you say the word 'ass'."  Once the giggling and excitement waned...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

So 2 twins are going into first grade, and they lead some new "words" on the playing field

They aren't very good words, and their mother does not like hearing them at home. So one night she tells them before tucking them in "Those aren't very good words, and there will be consequences if I here them in this house again." So they replied "Sure mom!" So the next morning she asks Jimmy "Jimm...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Tommy and Billy decide it is time they start swearing. ..

Ten year old Tommy and his eight year old brother Billy are in their bunk bed when Tommy declares "I think it is time we start swearing"
Billy says "Yeah!"
Tommy says "Tomorrow I'm going to use the word 'bitch'"
Billy says "I'm going to use the word 'fuck'"
They fall asleep happy...

My buddy Sam is a thief.

My friend Sam wasn't always this way. You see, we grew up in the poor part of town, although his dad worked hard and provided, where mine was not around much and when he was my mom always yelled at him to find a permanent job. As a child I remember showing up to his house every day before school and...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two young brothers, eight and seven years old, are playing video games.

The older boy says: At breakfast tomorrow, we should say a cuss word!

The younger brother agrees and they go to bed that night giggling with excitement.

The next morning, their mom says to the older brother: What do you want for breakfast?

The boy replies: Aw, hell, gimme some C...

Sam 'n' Eric decide to be more grown up by cursing...

Their mother wakes them for breakfast, and asks them what they want to eat.
Sam says "Aw, hell, gimme some Cheerios."
Furious, his mother backhands him across the kitchen, turns to Eric and asks "What do *you* want to eat?"
Eric stammers "I-I-I dunno, but it sure ain't gonna be n...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

2 little brothers wanted to make mommy mad.

Little Kyle is 4 years old and his brother Timmy is 3.
Kyle says "Hey, Timmy. Want to make mommy mad?"
"Sure! How?" Timmy says.
Kyle tells him "We gotta say a bad word, I'll say a 4 letter word since I'm 4. You have to say one that's 3 letters."
"OK! This sounds like fun!" said Timmy....

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

So this one time I was on a bus with my girlfriend...

..and she started getting frisky. She offers to give me head and I (of course) oblige her. She immediately drops to the floor and starts going to town, but shortly after she starts - we hit a bump and I blow my load into the back of her throat. At this point, she starts to choke and then proceeds to...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two brothers decide they're old enough to start cursing

So one morning little six year old Johny grabs his little 4 year old brother Jimmy and pulls him into the closet under the stairs.

Johny- "Jimmy, I think it's time we started cursing. I'm going to say, DAMN."

Jimmy - "Yeah yeah yeah, damn! Damn!"

Johny- "No Jimmy you need your ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A tale of two brothers.

One brother is 8, the other is 6. One day the 8 year old decides they're going to be "men" and start cursing in front of people. They're up in their room before breakfast, and the 8 year old talks the 6 year old into it:

8YO: Okay, when we get down to breakfast, you say "ass" and I say "hell"...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Cereal Anyone?

Two young brothers are talking. The older brother says, "You know what younger brother? I'm tired of being treated like a kid, so I'm going to take up swearing. The first thing tomorrow I'm going to say 'hell'."

The younger brother always goes along with his older sibling and does not li...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two brothers hatch a plan before breakfast...

Two brothers, about six and four years old, wake up and start getting ready for the day.

The older brother tells the younger brother: "Today, we are going to learn how to cuss!"

And the younger brother, unsure about the idea says, "Haa, okay! How do we do that??"

The older bro...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

11 year old johnny decides to curse

Johnny was 11 years old and his little brother was 7.one morning Johnny decides its time to start cussing and his little brother agrees. a little while later their mom yells up the stairs and tells them to come down for breakfast.

When they get downstairs Mom looks at little Johnny and asks ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A body was found....

In the bus station early this morning.

A man was drowned in milk, buried in Cheerios, with a banana stuxk in his ass.

Police suspect a cereal killer....

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.