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Canes Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two pilots with white canes proceed to enter their plane's cockpit...

Two pilots with white canes are on their way to their passenger plane's cockpit. They tap here and there with the stick and enter the cockpit. One of the passengers , a business man , notices and exclaims , " Hey , are those two pilots blind?!" . This arises panic between the passengers. Soon afterw...

Y’Know white sugar canes are rare,

But brown sugar canes, demarara

I know a guy who collects candy canes...

...they are all in mint condition.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two pilots with dark eyeglasses and canes walk into a plane

Everyone starts to comment on it. And a guy asks the flight attendant:
-Excuse me, but it looks that both the pilot and the co-pilot are blind, is this a joke? How are they able to pilot?
To which she answered
-I’m sorry sir, but they are the best and most experienced duo in this Airline a...

Whats the difference between Ornaments, Candy Canes, Myself, and the Star?

You don't hang the star

If slow old men use walking sticks, what do fast old men use ?

Hurry canes.

What do canes and blue pills have in common?

They're both ready for use when a man is limp.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The airplane was filled with people to the last seat, everyone was waiting for the pilot and co-pilot to arrive.

Finally they come. The people can see them through the windows, they get inside the plane and the passengers are freaked out. Both pilot and co-pilot are wearing blindfolds marking them as blind, have white canes with them and dark sunglasses. The people freak out a bit, but after both of them get i...

I found some leftover candy canes from last year that were still in their packaging.

They were in mint condition.

Eventually, all hipsters will age and end up needing canes to help them walk...

...ironically.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Airplane passengers watch nervously

As two men wearing pilots' uniforms and dark glasses use canes to feel their way into the cockpit.

 

The plane starts barreling down the runway, and the passengers begin to get scared as the water at the end of the airstrip nears. With only a few yards left, everyone screams,...

My 83 year old grandfather is still trying to be a successful rapper, his name?

Two canes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A store announces that from 8:00 to 9:30 am they'll only be attending senior customers and offering discounts

By 7:30 there was already a big line of grandpas and grandmas waiting outside. Suddenly a nice car pulls up, a young man gets out and proceeds to cut in front of everyone. He gets immediately smacked in the head with a cane by an old lady. He brushes it off and keeps going. This time a lot of canes ...

I saw a bunch of old people protesting outside of Chick-fil-A...

They were raising canes.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Pilots

One day the passengers of a flight were waiting impatiently for takeoff. After a few minutes, they notice two men dressed as pilots with white canes and guide dogs make their way into the cockpit. The mood of the plane shifts dramatically from impatient and anxious to scared and skeptical as the pla...

I got two packs o' sugar...

Call me Two Canes

^I'm ^sorry.

No way Jose! Another? I can Harvey believe it. Irma find somewhere safer to live.

The local chicken shack changed its name in honor of the occasion. They're now Raisin HurriCanes.

Love at Last!

George, age 92 and Edith, age 89 are all excited about their decision to get married.They go for a stroll to discuss the wedding and on the way they pass a drugstore. George suggests they go in and he addresses the man behind the counter.

"Are you the owner? "The pharmacist answers, "Yes". <...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A woman and her annoying nephew entered a lawn bowling contest.

The sun was out, the grounds had been immaculately prepared and every retiree within city limits had turned out for the event. Pearl had to admit that she was feeling better about the day now that it had finally arrived.

A few weeks ago when her delinquent of a sister had foisted her awful...

Discipline is important

A wife calls her husband into their son's room. She says, "Look what I found under Johnny's bed!" as she points to a suitcase filled with whips, paddles, canes, and cat–o'–nine–tails of every size, color, and material. "What are we going to do with him?" she asks. The father looks at the suitcase,...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An elderly couple celebrate their 50th anniversary.

A man in a restaurant overhears an elderly couple next to him celebrate their 50th wedding anniversary.

"Dear do you remember 50 years ago when I proposed to you right here in this same spot?" the old man asks caressing his wife's hand.

"Yes honey I do remember." she replies smiling...

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