A plan to rob a bris was foiled by the Rabbi today...

Police are still baffled at how he managed to get a tip off!

A priest, a rabbi, and a minister walk into a bar

They all begin discussing their own churches and synagogue. As the night goes on, they drink more and more, and the discussion starts to turn competitive. Each starts to boast about how eloquent they are, and how great they are at converting non believers. Eventually, the bartender gets sick of it. ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What did Jimi Hendrix say after he accidentally cut the end of a jew's penis off?

"Excuse Me While I Bris This Guy"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two men at the urinals

Standing there, doing their business, when one starts to strike up a conversation.

"Excuse me, sir, do you happen to be Jewish?"

"Yes, indeed I am."

"And do you happen to be from Krakow?"

"Yes, how do you know?"

"And you always went to the little synagogue in the P...

A rabbi is hiring an assistant...

Rabbi Hoffman is hiring an assistant, and he’s interviewing a young man named Uri for the job.

The rabbi read through Uri’s resume. He had extensive community service, excellent grades, and had never missed service.

“This all looks very good, young man. I’m going to need help cleaning...

What's the name of the ceremony where really prideful Hebrews get circumcised?

The Hu-Bris

Two Jewish men are standing in the bathroom and peeing in adjacent urinals

the one to the right finishes doing his business, turns around, and says to his neighbor, “Tell me, did Mohel Rabinovich do your bris [i.e. circumcision]?” “Yes,” the other guy responds, “how did you know?!!!” “Well, Rabinovich is a little cross-eyed and you are peeing on my shoes!”

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Circumcision Joke [nsfw]

A mohel (for those who don't know, a mohel/moyel/mohil is a Jewish person trained as a circumciser for the bris) is about to retire and calls his friend in to tell him the news. His friend said "Why that's wonderful news, you've spent many a year behind the knife, I bet you'll be glad to retire." ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

After 40 years a Rabbi retires... (long)

during his time, he performed many bris' (circumcisions) and saved the foreskins. As a retirement gift to himself he took the collected foreskins to a leather craftsman and asked him to make something with them.

The leatherman looked at the collection and thought for a bit, and said "sure, s...

A man is walking down the street

When he notices his watch has stopped. Seeing a shop window filled with watches and clocks, he goes inside
“My watch has stopped, could you take a look at it?” He asks the man behind the counter.
“Oh, I’m sorry. I don’t work on watches. You see, I’m a Mohel.”
“What’s a Mohel?”
“Well, a M...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What does a Japanese man experience when he marries a Jewish woman?

marital bris

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.