A bashful Chinese couple gets married . . .

On their honeymoon, the husband asks, "So what do you want to do?"

The wife replies, "I think I want 69."

The husband is shocked.

"You want Beef and Broccoli now?!!!"

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The bashful bride and Groom

The bashful bride and groom were delighted to be finally alone in their honeymoon suite. Blushing, the bride asked her new husband, “Johnny, now that we’re married, could you tell me what a penis is?”
Pleases to discover his wife was a virgin, he took out his penis and showed it to her...

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What happened to Juan?!

There once was a man named Juan(65M), who was seeing this woman named Maria(60F)... every Saturday, they had a ritual. They would meet up at the local park, sit on the bench, and Maria would hold his penis. They enjoyed about a year of this relationship, before one Saturday, Juan failed to show.
...

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Four older gentlemen are out golfing, sharing about their lives and eventually the topic of their children's professional success is brought up. The first guy steps up, hurriedly takes his shot, wiffs the ball off into the woods, and starts walking to find his ball without saying a word...

The second man steps up to take his shot and confidently reports, "My son is doing pretty well. He's just been promoted to manager of the car dealership he works at. In fact, he's doing so well gave the last lady he was seeing a brand new sports car." Then he takes takes a swing and drives the ball ...

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Troubled moth.

Moth flutters into a podiatrist office ..

doc: what be the problem moth?

Moth: I don’t even know where to begin... life suck , people really fuckin suck, I want to take my fully loaded and cocked 9mm n blow my god damn brains out.

Doc: whoaa! You’re troubled moth!! But why did...

While taking a census an official approached the home of Mrs Karen

After asking her a series of questions and taking down her replies, he asked her age. She chuckled bashfully and replied," have you asked the Ms Hills next door?" " No" was his confused reply. " I'm about as old as them" she told.

The next week she went to check her updated details and she s...

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A pregnant woman was walking past the bank one day when she heard three gun shots...

The woman awoke to the sound of small voice cooing as she slowly tried to grasp her surroundings. As she awoke, laying in a hospital bed, in pain and confusion, the doctor explained that she was caught in the crossfire of an active bank robbery and was shot in the stomach 3 times. Miraculously, the...

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Little Johnny came home after playing with his older friends.

His friends kept using adult words and making jokes. Johnny laughed, but he never understood what the words meant. He walks over to his dad and asks: "Dad, what's a hooker?"

The dad, taken slightly aback by the bashful Johnny, decided he did not want Johnny to know that kind of language yet. ...

[NSFW] The seven dwarfs decided one day that they’re going to watch Snow White get undressed

So they go outside and stack themselves on top of each other to peer through her window:

Doc, Happy, Grumpy, Sneezy, Bashful, Sleepy, Dopey

“She’s taking off her shirt...”

“She’s taking off her shirt...”

“She’s taking off her shirt...”

...

“She’s taking off ...

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A prince is hanging out with his best friend

Friend: So you want to break up with her?

Prince: Yeah, I have to.

Friend: Just because she is really shy, moody, dumb, has allergies, and has narcolepsy?

Prince: That is not what I said. I said she is fucking Bashful, Grumpy, Happy, Dopey, Sneezy, and Sleepy!

A recent study shows that 6 out of 7 persons affected with dwarfism are not happy.

They are grumpy, sleepy, dopey, bashful, sneezy and doc.

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The seven dwarves went to the Vatican

While six stayed back a few yards Doc went up and knocked on the front door.

"Your Excellency," he said. "I wonder if you could tell me if there are any 3 ft tall nuns in Rome?"

"No, my son, there aren't," the Pope replied.

So Doc went back and told the others. Pretty soon Ba...

What do you call a shy person with a hammer?

BASHful!

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How the Seven Dwarfs got their names..

Miss Snow White was a randy cow
And desperate for a fcuk,
So off she went into the woods
To try and get some luck.

She’d almost given up looking
When she saw some chimney smoke,
Then she stumbled on the cottage
And went on in for a poke.

Her clothes came off in second...

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The 7 Dwarfs had twin friends, Horny and Serious visiting from out of town.

Doc walks in to the living room and sees one of them with his pants off playing with his junk right out in the middle of the room.

“You can’t be serious” he yells.

“No,” he replied, “he’s fucking bashful.”

A new comprehensive study found that only ~14.3% of dwarves are Happy

The study went on to show that the rest of them are Grumpy, Sleepy, Dopey, Bashful, Sneezy, and Doc.

A woman gets called into her office HR department

They tell her that they noticed her password for her login was very unusual and asked her how she chose "DocGrumpyHappySleepyBashfulSneezyDopeySacarmento"

She said - "well the instructions were to have a password with seven characters and have at least one capitol, so I thought I was just fo...

A guy walks into a bar...

... with his dog a step behind him. The bartender immediately looked up and said

"Hey, city ordinance, no animals allowed where food or drink is served!"

The guy looks apologetic, but says "I'm sorry, but this is no ordinary dog. This is my magic talking dog! Look, if I can convince ...

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A man visits a brothel

A man—a salesman to be exact—is driving along an old two lane highway. It’s the worst part of his territory, as it takes him far from home for days on end.

He misses his wife, his tv, his wife, his la-z-boy, and most of all...his wife.

His mind starts to wander as he thinks of his wi...

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A newly anointed priest is given his first posting.

Father Ben a newly anointed priest is given his first posting of his career. He’s fairly young and very nervous, but seeing his distress, Father Todd the elderly priest he’s replacing was very thoughtful and had prepared some cheat sheets so everything would transition smoothly. Hidden behind the al...

A man finds himself in a hotel lobby. The lady at the front desk is giving him big "F me" eyes.

Now, sure, he's seen prettier women in his lifetime. But she's a solid seven, and looking at him in such a sultry fashion that his knees nonetheless knock together nervously.

"You can have me, right here, right now, or you can carry on to success," she whispers, tracing her finger slowly down...

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I watched the classic Snow White with my wife the other night. We went to bed shortly after and I started fooling around a bit

[Aside: hi /r/Jokes I am working on this proto-joke. Can you suggest how to make it work better?]

Wait, stop, she said, I’m Sleepy.

Well high-ho, I thought; she’s doing a bit of role play. I thought I’d better get in character too. It wasn’t too much of a stretch for me to play some H...

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A grandfather takes his grandson on a fishing trip.

It's about midday, and the grandfather reaches in the cooler and pulls out a beer. The boy looks over, excited, and says, "Well I say Grandpa! That looks pretty good! Can I have one?"

The Grandfather thinks for a moment and asks, "Can you make your dick touch your asshole?"

Bashful, an...

A Newly Wed Chinese Couple Go on Their Honeymoon

They get to the hotel late. The bride is visibly nervous and the groom is patiently and lovingly trying to reassure her.

He says "You don't need to worry about anything. Anything you want, I do for you."

Feeling a bit calmer she inquisitively looks at him and says "anything?"

"A...

A guy walks into a bar...

And he’s got a tiny head, completely disproportionate to his muscled body. One of the bar patrons goes up to him and asks, “So um... how’d that happen?” The man gulps down his drink and sighs. He’s recounted this story before.

“So I met this fairy by the lake. And she was absolutely beautifu...

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Vodoo Dick

A woman complains to her friend that she hasn't been laid in years and she feels so lonely. Her friend suggests that she visit the Haitian store and she will get help. The woman is curious so she goes to the store and bashfully explains her situation to the store owner. He pulls out a wooden phallus...

Pretty good for a joke that is a hundred years old.

A bashful cowboy, returning from the plains to civilized society
after an absence of several years, fell desperately in love at first
sight with a pretty young girl whom he met at a party.

On leaving the house that evening the young lady forgot her
overshoes, and the hostess, who had...

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A man and his frog

A man is sitting in a bar with his pet frog. The man catches a fly that lands on the bar top underneath a glass. "Alright watch this" he says to the other patrons. In a quick motion he removes the glass and as soon as the fly tries to get away the frog snatches it out of the air.
A woman who see...

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