Did I tell you the time I fell in love during a backflip?
I was heels over head!!
The Boston Zoo had a large problem.
The Boston Zoo had a very large problem. Their most popular attraction, a gorilla named Jamie, had died unexpectedly in the night. Ticket sales were projected to plummet if this gorilla couldn’t be seen, so the zoo manager decided to hire a man to dress up in a gorilla costume and pretend to be Jami...
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
A police officer pulls over a car he spots swerving all over the road, and asks the driver to step out of the vehicle. A clearly inebriated man reeking of beer stumbles out of the car...
The officer tells the man that he pulled him over because of his erratic driving and strongly suspects that he is under the influence of alcohol.
"No way, offisher. I just came from work and I am \*hic\* good-to-go," the man slurs and stumbles a little.
"Well just to be safe, would you...
The flea jumping competition begins
Fleas from all over the country have gathered here today to take part in the contest. Expect an incredible show.
Team 1 from Muts-4-homes Animal Shelter take the stage.
The team lines up on the platform...
6 -- 5 -- ...
Three potatoes decide to go to the swimming pool.
The first potato goes to the lowest diving board, does a simple forward flip, and lands flawlessly in the water, before coming back up for air, and swims off.
The second potato climbs to the next diving board, does a more intricate double-backflip in the air, and lands feet-first into the wat...
*gymnast does a double-triple-super-ultra-backflip-frontflip but takes a tiny step when she lands*
Me : *mouthful of pringles* what a loser
A husband and wife go dancing . . .
A husband takes his wife dancing.
They notice a guy on the dance floor living large, break dancing, moon walking, backflips, the works.
The wife turns to her husband and says, "See that guy? 25 years ago, he proposed to me and I turned him down."
Husband says: "Looks like he's ...
The Scientific Method
A scientist was demonstrating his latest research to a group of scientists at a science symposium. He had trained a spider to follow voice commands. "Spider, go forward" The spider began walking on the table. "Spider, go left" The spider turned left. "Spider, go right" ...
The Windsurfer And The Two Fishermen
Two fishermen were sitting by a lake. Suddenly, a windsurfer raced past them and made a huge backflip, but failed the landing horribly. When he didn't surface the two fishermen sailed towards his floating surfboard. They threw their nets in and pulled him up and saw to their horror that he was compl...